Koffee with Kimi

Kimi let slip a funny the other day.
“You don't have to be Einstein to understand that this is not the right way to fight for the title,” said Raikkonen. “It's not over yet, but now it will take a miracle, like one that makes lightning strike twice.”

Erm. Kimi, you also don't have to be Einstein to undertsand that there is nothing miraculous about lightning striking twice. Lightning strikes a thousand times, a million times, has been doing so since the world came to be.
I think you mean lightning striking the same spot twice. Hmmm. Yes.

(Very much like Preity Zinta on KJo's show. "Skimmerish," said the intelligent Zinta.
Tee hee.)

Sorry, sorry. I like Kimi, even. Am just being catty.

Oops.

Kimi sees red.
Because Hammie didn't.

In other news.

Good Gawde has just reminded me that I haven't been keeping my vast readership up to date with various developments in my life and my very important opinions on events transpiring across the world. I thank him. All four of my readers also thank him. Especially Ma. And Pa. ;)

First things first. Get well soon, BB. That stomach trouble you've been having is causing trepidation across the globe. Your legion of admirers is on tenterhooks, biting their finger and toe-nails in an atmosphere of uncertainty and anxiety. Bu chuss yehai dapan ki tsu gess gasun jald nish jald theek. Booz-thha? Shaabaash.

And now on to more public topics. The Turkish GP yesterday. What a fantastic race! Finally a really exciting watch after oh-so-many races.We've had few and far between. The Brazilian GP to wind things up last season in October was a thriller. Then the season-opener in Melbourne this year was entertainng. And after a couple of boring months, yesterday's great race in Istanbul. Well done, little Massa. And Hammie, just when I had lost all hope in you, you took it up one notch and drove a damn good race. The 'Surpise!' three-pit-stop strategy almost worked. Very well done. Kimi stormed in third, close on Hammie's heels. Poor Heikki. Had an unlucky race but some nice overtaking moves all along after his 'flat' start. And Alonso.... *sigh*... Let us take a moment to daydream about this wonderful Spaniard. He was tres bien as usual. And coming up next is the wonderful Monaco GP. Woo hooooo!

On to the IPL now. Started off with a bang in Bangalore, and the tempo's been good ever since. Bangalore's team is by far the biggest joke this tournament's thrown up. Mmmppfhfhppphhhh. *That's muffled laughter*. Tired and Test-ed, is what the Royal Challengers are all about. The Saab is gunning for Dhoni's Chennai Superkings and Delhi's Daredevils (a lot of which has to do with Akshay 'hubba-hubba' Kumar being their posterboy.... I am not ashamed of this fact. I can't help it.) Other teams that look good are of course Warne's Jaipur lads. And Kolkata has a few very bright sparks in the form of Saurav Da and an impressive bowling line-up: Ishant Sharma, Umar Gul, Dinda and possibly, Shoaib Actor, no, no!, Akhtar. (Thanks to Sir Khurram Abbas in the Amreeka for this moniker.)

And then! Soccer. ManuU have romped home with the Barclays English Premier League cup. Whatte! Waiting for Moscow where they'll hopefully make it a double and win the Champions League as well. Chelsea were kicking up a happy storm last night when they saw a faint light at the end of the tunnel with their goal against Bolton. If Man U drew, that would be it. As it turned out though, the Wanderers pulled out a gorgeous equaliser themselves and Chelsea was left undone. Ronaldo had a foot in this winning match as well, and thanks to Rooney, Giggsy pulled off a nice second goal towards the end of the match. And that wrapped it up for the Reds.

In other news, looks like Barack Obama's going to be it. Unless the law suddenly changes and it turns out Dubya can run for another term. In which case it's probable that America will reinstate him as Prez. Ho hum.

Sunday, Bloody Sunday

It was a Sunday I had waited for, for a very, very long time. Two days almost. I woke up at the crack of dawn, around 12:30pm, buzzing with excitement at the impending high-action drama that was to follow. High-action on the part of my favourite sports persons, not me - I was only going to be adjusting the body into a comfortable supine position most conducive to telly-watching.
Cooked a quickie pasta lunch for the Sister since she has strange food cravings every fortnight or so and simple daal-chawal just doesn't cut it. Finished Facebooking for a bit and got down to business.
I had a packed schedule to adhere to. Beginning with the Bahrain GP.Expectations ran high and there was a palpable tension in the air of the Haji household as various family members seated themselves in accordance with their F1 loyalties. Self assumed comfy left corner slot in the McLaren stand. Cousin Suhail and Br Ozz occupied opposite right corner slot, being the Ferrari faction. Sister and mother looked disgusted and left because we made them turn off 'Phir Bhi Dil Hai Hindustani' and switched to Raceday.
Feeling glad that BMW did so well in qualifying, I put my faith in ze Germans thinking McLaren and BMW would sweep the podium. After all, two little red spots on the radar could be overcome, non? NO! Goddammit.
Lights on, lights off, Go, Go, GO! Except Mr Hamilton remained stationary, while the rest of the field whizzed past. Massa took over P1 right from the first turn and so it remained till he came home with the top podium place. Iceman Kimi made it a comfy Ferrari 1-2. Sigh. Hamilton added to his already incredible start by trying to mount Alonso's Renault from behind (see pic)! What was this? Delayed vengeance for last year? Gadzooks! Ferrari had a thumping victory, BMW walked in tall and proud to take the lead in the Constructor's and all of a sudden Self was feeling very hard done by. Good on you, Heikki, but McLaren's been looking dodgy in these past two races.
Moments of the race:
1. The start that ended it all.
2. Impressive BMW driving and speed throughout.
3. Hamilton's screw-up with Alonso. ("Racing incident" indeed. Hmmph.)
4. Superb driving from Fisichella in the Force India team, and the great battle between him and Hamilton for three or four laps before Hammy finally managed to over take him. And really, Lewis, there was no need for your juvenile hand gesture to Fisi. Why the hell should he have moved? You were racing.
5. The Button and Coulthard tussle.
6. Fisi finishing one place ahead of Hamilton. Haw haw.
7. Superb racing by Alonso, again.

Other exciting occurrences during that evening were extraneous to the actual race. A sudden shriek from the materfamilias jerked our attention to the fact that the inverter was spontaneously combusting and that disturbing smell of burning wires was spreading through the domestic territory. In addition to this, and for dramatic effect, thin wisps of evil, black smoke were emanating from said inverter. In a frenzied manner, all of us family members started yelling our opinions on the matter and speculating on the best method to combat this hazardous phenomenon of flaming electronic devices. For a longish time nothing of any actual use was proposed until better sense prevailed and it was decided to nip the problem in the bud. Or plug. We used our 'kaanoon ka lamba haath' personified by Ozz, who stood on tiptoe on a chair, grappled with the main switch and finally managed to kill the inverter. With the result that all the power in the house was also killed. Hence ending our mouth-agape-viewing of the Bahrain GP. Truth be told, I didn't give a bloody damn any more. I learnt soon, from various taunting texts and jibes that Ferrari had reigned supreme and McLaren indeed 'had gone red in the face'.
*Shakes head*
Cut to an hour later, helpful electrician had restored power and semblance of sanity to household and the TV was ready to entertain us again.
Onwards to Hyderabad where the second of three ICL finals was taking place. With great enthusiasm, the entire Haji family plus Cousin Suhail forgot past divisions and sat down as one to cheer on the Lahore Badshahs. The Lahore Badshahs had to win, 'and of course they will today!' was the general consensus.
Nyet. Nothing doing. Scores level in the last over. Both teams at 130, and the match was to be decided by a bowl-out. Ha ha, say the Hajis. The Pakis are so good at bowling, it's a cinch. (I myself was having internal, horrified flashback of T20 India-Pak bowl-out...) And so it went. The Hyderbad Heroes kept their heads at a time they needed to. Their bowlers did what presumably all bowlers across the world, from indoor drawing-room cricket, to gully-cricket, to net-practice to international level cricket bowlers are supposed to do, viz. hit the stumps. The Lahore Badshahs screwed it all up in the end. Zero out of three hits. The Heroes got a healthy three out of four hits and it was all over. Poor Inzy, having to apologize over and over and over for his team's infuriating performances. Ah, well, still can't help loving them. 'Hai jazbaa-e-junoon toh himmat na haar' etc.
Saving grace: Abdul Razzaq won Man of the Series, a trophy woth Rs 1 crore and a cheque of Rs 40 lacs.
In the meanwhile I learnt that ManU had just barely drawn with Middlesborough, giving Chelsea a very good chance to take the top spot of the EPL. Grrr. Rooney came in with a late equaliser or else it was another huge upset in keeping with the day's events thus far. So now Man United are only three points ahead on the table at 77.

Later on in the night (the damn Sunday just wasn't getting over), I managed to catch Rafael Nadal lose the Sony Ericsson final, 6-2, 6-4, to Davydenko. I mean, I like Nikolay, but I wanted Rafa to win, okay???
A few hours later, in the middle of the night, Sister, Ozz, Suhail and self were playing spades. Girls versus boys. We drew at one game all after a sensational landslide victory in the first round. It was not a good feeling.

All in all, this Sunday was a write off. As Skinny rightly mentioned, I was in a 'talk to me and I'll kill you' mood.

Pics stolen off: formula1.com, EPL site, ICL site, espn

Hmmmph.

So. Ferrari won Sepang. Massa spilled himself messily somewhere along the line. Heikki came in an impressive third for McLaren. Hamilton crawled in 5th and Alonso babe (who's hitting the headlines again with subtle hints about a year-end break-up with Renault) came in a wonderful 8th in spite of his pitiful Renault.
I am writing off this race. Where were the thrills and spills, I ask you? And no rain either.
Kimi drove brilliantly start-to-Finnish (hahahahahaaaaa, Saab, you're funny!) and won. Yawn. Remember the good old days when this lad was with McLaren Mercedes? Vaav. McLaren still on top in the Constructor's but really, what a silly race. Bahrain better be better.

BMW, well done again. This year's podiums are all opened up. And Toyota..? Well, well, well Mr Trulli. *polite applause*
Force India, we're waiting.

Anyway. Hmmph.

Gentlemen, start your engines.

Ta da. The 2008 racing season has begun....

And these two guys look like they're going to be sitting on top of things again. Raikkonen came in fastest during the first practice session and Lewis Hamilton took the lead in the second. Lewis should try to do this year what he lost out on in the last race of 2007. (Wow, remember that?) Looks like it'll be another Ferrari-McLaren tussle for top spot this year. It's almost sad. I like Kimi a lot, but on principle I cannot support the Reds.
One had hopes of Renault doing something what with Alonso back in the team now, but their engine is just not impressive enough.
And speaking of impressive, let's talk about Force India, shall we? Giancarlo Fisi came in 9th after Practice Session 2. The car already looks much better than what Dr Mallya acquired from Spyker last year. Particularly liked how Mallya said that F1 was "not a hobby", it was "a very expensive business." He's going about it the right way.

And so... till Sunday morning, 1000hrs, Indian Standard Time. Go, McLaren!!!!

Pic Courtesy: F1.com

F1 update

Heee heee. I like this Vijay Mallya. One 'attitude' answer from the bearded baron, on his acquisition of Spyker [crossing of t's and dotting of i's on the deal to be completed by September end]:

Q: Did you look into any other motorsport options?
VM: Formula One is the crown of motor sport and it is my style to look at the crown and not at the grass roots.

Meanwhile, at Fuji today, Hamilton took another well-deserved pole, making him an almost-certain winner of the Driver's Championship, 2007. Alonso crashed out [:-(], rookie Heikki Kovalainen came in 2nd for Renault with a few near run-ins with 3rd place Kimi and Ferrari. Kimi started at 21st [!!!]. Brilliant driving.

Kick-ass moment of the race came at the very end when Massa pulled a great skin-of-his-teeth overtake on Robert Kubica. Vaaav.

Two more races to go this season. Hamilton stands at 107 points, ahead of Alonso at 95 points and Kimi in third at 90.

Not to put too fine a point upon it....

Monza!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

McLaren pulled a perfect one-two at Monza yesterday, with some kickass top speed, blinding laps from Fernando Alonso all through the race to clinch pole position and a lovely overtaking maneuver by Lewis Hamilton after his Pit Stop #2 to pull in second ahead of Kimi.

* Hamilton's view as he overtakes Raikkonen.
The Hamilton-Raikkonen overtake was THE moment of the race for me, because I was afraid Kimi's one-stop strategy might just be able to take away the second position from McLaren. And eeks! It did for a bit, when Kimi pulled in just ahead of Lewis' car exiting from the pit lane.
But Kimi had suspension trouble [yeah, whatever] and Lewis managed a neat overtake on the first chicane which left me screeching with joy, high-fiving nobody, punching the air with my fists and renting the peace of the neighborhood asunder with some very juvenile cheering...
*All race pics bummed off the F1 site.

As is usual on weekends, Suhail bhai had come over and we had a rollicking mad time. I had promised chicken pulao [mama-style] and I delivered. Accompaniments were tangy tomato chutney and yoghurt. [For excellent pulao recipe, please send me fan mail.]A very burpalicious, albeit late-ish lunch was had around 4:30pm.
What followed was the absolute nuttiest Sister and Suhail have ever been in a long time. There was one hour to kill before the race started and the Deranged Duo decided to sing the blues away. (They thought they were really good.) A number of very elegant, soulful, classic Hindi film songs were destroyed in the process as our two star performers refused to shut up till the hour was up. The horrific renditions were punctuated by a series of giggling fits, tune-improvisations and very, very bad poetry. [Which is a loose term for rhyming words.]
Fortunately all tales of terror must have an ending, and in spite of it seeming like Time stood still while these two yodelers went caterwauling, the glorious hour of 5:30pm eventually came and my miseries ceased.
Start lights on, lights off, and GO!

Ozz and Suhail [boys in pic] are Reds - Ferrari supporters. [Blech.] They stopped acting cocky soon after reality sunk in, which is to say post the Lewis overtake which sealed the McLaren one-two deal. Hah. Sister was with McLaren, so no animosity there. [McLaren fans' -sis and I- pic on left].
To celebrate our resounding victory, I brought in some steaming hot noonchai along with a gloating smile, and special Kashmiri bakery: Kishtwari kulchay and baakirkhaani. The opinion all round was that the chai was very good. I would like to thank Nandini-double-cream-pasteurized-homogenized-no-need-to-boil-before-use milk.

Once that was done, we watched some nonsense TV programs like Miss Teen USA, AXN Fear Factor Psycho, Page 3 type no-brainer entertainment segments, and primed ourselves for the US Open Men's Finals, which according to many sources would be played at 9:30pm , IST. This turned out to be the biggest lie of the century as many hours later, droopy-eyed and despairing, we realized that the match would only be played at a mysterious, suspenseful hour which none of us would be able to guess at. Another friendship, Iqbal, had also come over in the hopes of being able to see Federer win the Open, but his dreams and aspirations were thwarted as no LIVE broadcast from Flushing Meadows seemed available. Except the insipid Women's Doubles Finals which was not gripping at all.

Suhail and Doc eventually left around 1:30am by which time we all convinced ourselves that the match would only happen post 4:30 am IST. This turned out to be the second biggest lie of the century because as it turned out, the match started at 2:30am, which fact Suhail bhai called in to inform us of.

I watched the match very sleepily, from a supine posish under a comfortable blanket in the TV room. My involvement in the proceedings was at best lackluster and I slept through many points.

And that was the Sunday that was.

What's going on, boys?

Another great run for McLaren at Hungary, but as usual, a cloud came along to spoil the silver lining's party. No Constructor Points for Team McLaren on account of some shady business during the Qualifying. Bleehhhhhh. Well done, Lewis. Alonso.... Promise us more drama at Turkey?
Before the whole world and its uncle jumps in to fling mud at Alonso, though, have a look here.
Look like there MIGHT POSSIBLY BE another side to the story. Mayhap young Lewis was a little bit to blame himself? This is not to say that Alonso doesn't have a habit of getting headlined in the most awful stories. One must admit, the guy has a knack.
In any case, I adore both drivers though I have no idea how they still manage to work around each other. Slight awkwardness at the office, what?
Great run by Raikkonen as well, but overtaking was always going to be next to impossible on this circuit. [Thought to self: Why, oh WHY did he switch to Ferrari?]