The Hate Brigade

"Don't you just love it when 'Anonymous' comes into your life and pees in a corner of the room?"
This is something I happened to ask Good Gawde after a nonsense person left a rude comment on one of his posts. What is up with that? It was a charming post, I thought personally. Amusing, sarky, serious and informative in the right proportions. *applause*

Once upon a time I posted a harmless home video of the tragicomic reaction of my family minutes after Pak's 'Misbah 5 Runs' loss to India at the first T20 World Cup, on YouTube. Shockingly got lots of hits and even more shockingly started a war of words (and not very kind words) on the India-Pakistan-Kashmir situation. I tried replying reasonably for a longish time and deleted most of the obscene stuff coming in. So many kind suggestions from Indians for me and all bloody Kashmiris to go 'back' to Pakistan (obviously on foot, and not in the sense that Kashmir should go to Pakistan), Pakistani friends effing and $%#%#-ing Indian counterparts in equal measure, religious extemporising, Islam-Terror-Jihad allusions etc. Lots and lots of pleasant stuff like that. Then, wonder of wonders, one day I found the 'Disable Comments' option and life was so much simpler after!

I can understand not liking something someone has written or an opinion expressed, but wherefore the rudeness and getting personal and juvenile arguments that follow? Take any YouTube video and chances are you'll spot some loser saying something really nasty in the comments. Here's what amazes me: What a shit load of time people must have to post comments on random sites and pick fights with strangers who then also get involved with their hearts and souls. Entertaining actually if it wasn't so annoying.
I hate rude people. Just saying.

Crickety Poems - By Anoopa Anand

Step 1. Go to Anoopa's leftarmspinster blog.
Step 2. Enjoy.

Excerpt from But mostly, seventeen thousand runs featuring Sachin Ramesh Tendulkar:

"So carefully I position my computer at the stumps,
my mouse at silly point,
my eye on the outfield,
my heart with the wicketkeeper."

Sri Lankan players injured

Profiles of...
(from BBC)

Lahore Attack on Sri Lankan Team

What the...? Of all the sports teams in the world, Sri Lanka's cricket team is probably the nicest bunch and this makes Lahore's senseless attack all the more disturbing.
Which is not to say I would be celebrating if the Aussies were the target. Just adds to the incredulity of this whole mess.
Very Munich, which mixes someting clean like sports with mindless, dirty politics.As usual, the BBC gives the most comprehensive coverage. Read here.

My pick of the quotes in the aftermath of said incident:
South Africa captain Graeme Smith: "The word 'tragedy' is often used to describe a setback on a sporting field but this is a real tragedy. It is a tragedy for all the people of Pakistan and Sri Lanka, it is a tragedy for cricket and it is a tragedy for all decent people."
That's all.

Nice blog post on The Dawn's website here.
Comments below blog were all sensible, mature and sincere. Very, very strange and heartening to see.

In other news.

Good Gawde has just reminded me that I haven't been keeping my vast readership up to date with various developments in my life and my very important opinions on events transpiring across the world. I thank him. All four of my readers also thank him. Especially Ma. And Pa. ;)

First things first. Get well soon, BB. That stomach trouble you've been having is causing trepidation across the globe. Your legion of admirers is on tenterhooks, biting their finger and toe-nails in an atmosphere of uncertainty and anxiety. Bu chuss yehai dapan ki tsu gess gasun jald nish jald theek. Booz-thha? Shaabaash.

And now on to more public topics. The Turkish GP yesterday. What a fantastic race! Finally a really exciting watch after oh-so-many races.We've had few and far between. The Brazilian GP to wind things up last season in October was a thriller. Then the season-opener in Melbourne this year was entertainng. And after a couple of boring months, yesterday's great race in Istanbul. Well done, little Massa. And Hammie, just when I had lost all hope in you, you took it up one notch and drove a damn good race. The 'Surpise!' three-pit-stop strategy almost worked. Very well done. Kimi stormed in third, close on Hammie's heels. Poor Heikki. Had an unlucky race but some nice overtaking moves all along after his 'flat' start. And Alonso.... *sigh*... Let us take a moment to daydream about this wonderful Spaniard. He was tres bien as usual. And coming up next is the wonderful Monaco GP. Woo hooooo!

On to the IPL now. Started off with a bang in Bangalore, and the tempo's been good ever since. Bangalore's team is by far the biggest joke this tournament's thrown up. Mmmppfhfhppphhhh. *That's muffled laughter*. Tired and Test-ed, is what the Royal Challengers are all about. The Saab is gunning for Dhoni's Chennai Superkings and Delhi's Daredevils (a lot of which has to do with Akshay 'hubba-hubba' Kumar being their posterboy.... I am not ashamed of this fact. I can't help it.) Other teams that look good are of course Warne's Jaipur lads. And Kolkata has a few very bright sparks in the form of Saurav Da and an impressive bowling line-up: Ishant Sharma, Umar Gul, Dinda and possibly, Shoaib Actor, no, no!, Akhtar. (Thanks to Sir Khurram Abbas in the Amreeka for this moniker.)

And then! Soccer. ManuU have romped home with the Barclays English Premier League cup. Whatte! Waiting for Moscow where they'll hopefully make it a double and win the Champions League as well. Chelsea were kicking up a happy storm last night when they saw a faint light at the end of the tunnel with their goal against Bolton. If Man U drew, that would be it. As it turned out though, the Wanderers pulled out a gorgeous equaliser themselves and Chelsea was left undone. Ronaldo had a foot in this winning match as well, and thanks to Rooney, Giggsy pulled off a nice second goal towards the end of the match. And that wrapped it up for the Reds.

In other news, looks like Barack Obama's going to be it. Unless the law suddenly changes and it turns out Dubya can run for another term. In which case it's probable that America will reinstate him as Prez. Ho hum.

This new cricket buzz...

The ICL series has come and gone in a heartbreaking fashion. I will of course, not mention the events that brought the series to a close. I tend to block bad memories out. (Damn and blast.)

IPL just taking off. Let's see how this goes. As of now, all I can pray for is that Shah Rukh Khan stop inviting Arjun Rampal to matches with him if he's going to act like an absolute jackass. Which is what he's been doing on both occasions so far. (Mr Rampal, what's with that hair? Were you too busy sucking up to Shah Rukh Khan to notice he finally chopped his embarrassing attempt a whiles ago? Or are you trying to oull a Milind Soman? Because that would be truly hilarious... )
And, SRK: Vivek Oberoi? Seriously?
Anyway. So the Kolkata Knight Riders are two for two, and Bangalore finally managed a win tonight. In thrilling Mark Boucher-ish fashion.
We shall watch with interest to see if all the hoopla is sustained.
In the meanwhile, Life carries on.
And Boomsa is walking a little way away from mine. To Secunderabad. Maudlin, painful, silly post to follow on that. Which won't even begin to cover it.
I mean, I know and up and left for Mumbai last December, but does that mean anyone else can? NO....
Bwaiiiii, Anupam.

Hah. Great.

ICL India beat ICL Pakistan. Hah. Schmah.

Sunday, Bloody Sunday

It was a Sunday I had waited for, for a very, very long time. Two days almost. I woke up at the crack of dawn, around 12:30pm, buzzing with excitement at the impending high-action drama that was to follow. High-action on the part of my favourite sports persons, not me - I was only going to be adjusting the body into a comfortable supine position most conducive to telly-watching.
Cooked a quickie pasta lunch for the Sister since she has strange food cravings every fortnight or so and simple daal-chawal just doesn't cut it. Finished Facebooking for a bit and got down to business.
I had a packed schedule to adhere to. Beginning with the Bahrain GP.Expectations ran high and there was a palpable tension in the air of the Haji household as various family members seated themselves in accordance with their F1 loyalties. Self assumed comfy left corner slot in the McLaren stand. Cousin Suhail and Br Ozz occupied opposite right corner slot, being the Ferrari faction. Sister and mother looked disgusted and left because we made them turn off 'Phir Bhi Dil Hai Hindustani' and switched to Raceday.
Feeling glad that BMW did so well in qualifying, I put my faith in ze Germans thinking McLaren and BMW would sweep the podium. After all, two little red spots on the radar could be overcome, non? NO! Goddammit.
Lights on, lights off, Go, Go, GO! Except Mr Hamilton remained stationary, while the rest of the field whizzed past. Massa took over P1 right from the first turn and so it remained till he came home with the top podium place. Iceman Kimi made it a comfy Ferrari 1-2. Sigh. Hamilton added to his already incredible start by trying to mount Alonso's Renault from behind (see pic)! What was this? Delayed vengeance for last year? Gadzooks! Ferrari had a thumping victory, BMW walked in tall and proud to take the lead in the Constructor's and all of a sudden Self was feeling very hard done by. Good on you, Heikki, but McLaren's been looking dodgy in these past two races.
Moments of the race:
1. The start that ended it all.
2. Impressive BMW driving and speed throughout.
3. Hamilton's screw-up with Alonso. ("Racing incident" indeed. Hmmph.)
4. Superb driving from Fisichella in the Force India team, and the great battle between him and Hamilton for three or four laps before Hammy finally managed to over take him. And really, Lewis, there was no need for your juvenile hand gesture to Fisi. Why the hell should he have moved? You were racing.
5. The Button and Coulthard tussle.
6. Fisi finishing one place ahead of Hamilton. Haw haw.
7. Superb racing by Alonso, again.

Other exciting occurrences during that evening were extraneous to the actual race. A sudden shriek from the materfamilias jerked our attention to the fact that the inverter was spontaneously combusting and that disturbing smell of burning wires was spreading through the domestic territory. In addition to this, and for dramatic effect, thin wisps of evil, black smoke were emanating from said inverter. In a frenzied manner, all of us family members started yelling our opinions on the matter and speculating on the best method to combat this hazardous phenomenon of flaming electronic devices. For a longish time nothing of any actual use was proposed until better sense prevailed and it was decided to nip the problem in the bud. Or plug. We used our 'kaanoon ka lamba haath' personified by Ozz, who stood on tiptoe on a chair, grappled with the main switch and finally managed to kill the inverter. With the result that all the power in the house was also killed. Hence ending our mouth-agape-viewing of the Bahrain GP. Truth be told, I didn't give a bloody damn any more. I learnt soon, from various taunting texts and jibes that Ferrari had reigned supreme and McLaren indeed 'had gone red in the face'.
*Shakes head*
Cut to an hour later, helpful electrician had restored power and semblance of sanity to household and the TV was ready to entertain us again.
Onwards to Hyderabad where the second of three ICL finals was taking place. With great enthusiasm, the entire Haji family plus Cousin Suhail forgot past divisions and sat down as one to cheer on the Lahore Badshahs. The Lahore Badshahs had to win, 'and of course they will today!' was the general consensus.
Nyet. Nothing doing. Scores level in the last over. Both teams at 130, and the match was to be decided by a bowl-out. Ha ha, say the Hajis. The Pakis are so good at bowling, it's a cinch. (I myself was having internal, horrified flashback of T20 India-Pak bowl-out...) And so it went. The Hyderbad Heroes kept their heads at a time they needed to. Their bowlers did what presumably all bowlers across the world, from indoor drawing-room cricket, to gully-cricket, to net-practice to international level cricket bowlers are supposed to do, viz. hit the stumps. The Lahore Badshahs screwed it all up in the end. Zero out of three hits. The Heroes got a healthy three out of four hits and it was all over. Poor Inzy, having to apologize over and over and over for his team's infuriating performances. Ah, well, still can't help loving them. 'Hai jazbaa-e-junoon toh himmat na haar' etc.
Saving grace: Abdul Razzaq won Man of the Series, a trophy woth Rs 1 crore and a cheque of Rs 40 lacs.
In the meanwhile I learnt that ManU had just barely drawn with Middlesborough, giving Chelsea a very good chance to take the top spot of the EPL. Grrr. Rooney came in with a late equaliser or else it was another huge upset in keeping with the day's events thus far. So now Man United are only three points ahead on the table at 77.

Later on in the night (the damn Sunday just wasn't getting over), I managed to catch Rafael Nadal lose the Sony Ericsson final, 6-2, 6-4, to Davydenko. I mean, I like Nikolay, but I wanted Rafa to win, okay???
A few hours later, in the middle of the night, Sister, Ozz, Suhail and self were playing spades. Girls versus boys. We drew at one game all after a sensational landslide victory in the first round. It was not a good feeling.

All in all, this Sunday was a write off. As Skinny rightly mentioned, I was in a 'talk to me and I'll kill you' mood.

Pics stolen off: formula1.com, EPL site, ICL site, espn

Be a sport

Have been in a very satisfied frenzy these past few days. Sporting encounters of all sorts are making one's ho-hum life all the more exciting.
To start with, the baby rebel Indian Cricket League has gripped me by the vitals on account of a certain Lahore Badshahs being part of the arrangement. This team takes one back to the wonder years of Pakistani cricket. Led by the big bear Inzy, coached by Moin Khan, and featuring all former Pak players I love, from Azhar Mahmood, Mushtaq Ahmed, Mohd Sami, Saqlain, Imran Nazir, Naved Rana, Hassan Raza, and so on and so forth. Why these brilliances were left out of the Pak national squad no one will ever know. And Pak's current dismal form is a result. So, the Lahore Badshahs are my favourites and the Lahore Badshahs are undefeated. First semifinal tonight v Kolkata Tigers. Who are going to lose!!!
And then. There's the football that's keeping us entertained. Not the bizarre American travesty where grown men wear body armor and tight pants and carry around a strangely-shaped object that they refer to as the ball. Tell me, whence foot and wherefore ball? What is wrong with those guys? The proper name of the game should be Running-Around-Handling-Leather-Thing. Eww.
Anyway, we're talking about the English Premier League AND the Champion's League. Weekends and weekdays accounted for. Man U sits pretty on top of the Barclay's board - with the even prettier Cristiano Ronaldo creating magic with Rooney. What eye candy. What legs. What fantastic skill. I love them.
Last night's Arsenal-Liverpool match was a ripper. Shame about the 1-1 draw, but Gerrard is really something else. What a game though! PS: Hleb should have been given a penalty, but the referee was really too far off and at a weird angle to see what went down. Hah. Bollocks! He was about ten yards away and had a ringside view, damn him!!! In a fair world, the final scoreline would have read Arsenal 2-1. "Fly Emirates!"
Onwards now. The Bahrain GP action starts tomorrow in the practice sessions. Hope floats on McLaren. Praying certain other teams go RED in the face after retiring/crashing/injuring pit crew and having mechanical problems.;) And that BMW continue their surprising good form. So far it's a McLaren-BMW one-two on the Constructor's. *stands up and applauds German engineering*
A little bit of tennis going on as well. Great Nadal-Blake match last night at the Sony Ericsson Open in Florida. Rafa looked down and out till the middle of the second set and then.... VAMOS! He was back, and took the match decisively in the third. Roddick-Fedex coming up too, though that's almost certainly going Fedex's way (however much people make a fuss about Roger losing his edge, that chink in his armour etc). To put things in perspective, Andy has lost 15 of the 16 times he's played Roger. Also, Serena-Kuznetsova match today. Serena, by the way, annihilated Justine in the quarters. Wha-hey!
Trivial Trivia: Uber-cool Boyd Tinsley of DMB (the violonist, duh) spotted several times at the Open.

Then. What else?
Oh, yes. The domestic sports scene. Since my brother Ozz is done with his II PUC exams, him and me make a formidable twosome as we head to the gym every night in our sports gear. We engage in great duels across a table-tennis table. It has to be said that Usman runs me over, destroys me, dances over my remains every night with cringe-inducing scorelines along the lines of "21 to nothing". That's number of games, not points. I have taken him to deuce only once. And have reached 18 or 19 on occasions I can count on the fingers of one hand. *Blush* Anyway, I don't care about that. "We play the game because we love it!" I mean to say, I really don't mind losing to him. I'm a loser.
On the bright side, you should check out my muscles now. Glutes that would make a sit-up champion envious. Streamlined calf muscles and biceps. Happy ache in tricep area. Working on abs and only time will tell. Love handles are fast disappearing. (And when I inhale deeply and hold my breath, I look quite something!)

And the movies I've been watching! Ruthie is my movie dealer. She has a kickass DVD rental shop near her digs and I go and get the latest movies from there. Plus she has her own sources for getting me unheard-of but very good Korean, Thai and other foreign language films. I'm on to a good thing here.
Acquired The Sea Inside yesterday, which is quite old. Must go watch now. Javier Bardem beckons.

Alonso goes Blue. So does Saab.

Yay! Yay! Yay! Fernando Alonso joins Renault again, and what with them announcing their new challenger -the R28, how cool!- in Jan 2008, I'm expecting a great season next year. Something that will have teams other than Ferrari and McLaren on podium places 1 and 2. [Just like I was fully expecting Pakistan to win the T20 and the following Indo-Pak series, and, unrelated to sports but a big realistic expectation: I was expecting the Amreekan public to send Bush out on his ass when he reran for Prez.] Anyway. Alonso is on with Renault for a two-year stint. I see clearly in my head a visual repetition of 2005 and 2006. (Fade to Trelawney's class and Divination...) And announcing Alonso's baby driver companion, Nelsinho Piquet. Whatte fun to see what kind of sparks fly between these two.

The dismal Indo-Pak test series also wound down to a close with a yawn-inspiring scoreline of 1-0 and two draws. Whatever happened to Indo-Pak fun. The one-day series was ho-hum as well. But that's because there is no real comparision between the headless team that Pakistan has right now and the professional setup India has got running. Where's the 'go-for-the-kill-yaar' aechichood? My love for Yo-Yo and Misbah has increased in geometric progression and inverse proportion [thank you Macro-Economic Theory] to my disillusionment with Team Pak as a whole. Hai rabba, where are the good old days when Was and Waqar used to steamroll in and destroy the furniture, when Moin and Wasim-bhai used to have hilarious stump-mic converstaions, when we had Saeed Anwars, Abdul Razzaqs, Saqlain, Ejaz, Azhar Mahmood and so much fun on the field?

Depressing.

In the meanwhile....

(Meaning the week and more that I was out of action - interesting news items of interest not in chronological order)
1. Pakistan won the penultimate and utterly useless final ODI, garnering a face-saving 3-2 scoreline. Hah. Big deal.
2. Imran Khan was released.
3. Nandigram became uglier and uglier and now it's par for the course so expect it'll move to Page 8 or 10 of the dailies soon.
4. Synchronised triple blast in UP, some b@$-turds taking innocent lives again for another incomprehensible motive.
5. India wins first test at Kotla easily. Kumble shines as captain, Tendulkar shines as always, Shoaib whines as always. Well, okay, he didn't whine. I'm a pissed fan. I can say anything. I'm waiting for hi to grow up into a captain. And I really think he should eat more. He looks near-death.
6. Saab in Bangalore researches life in Mumbai and readies self for the big Heave-Ho.
7. Pakistan still simmers under Busharraff's dictation.
8. Taslima Onscreen in another silly controversial attack-escape routine.
9. Kolkata sees fire.
10. Darjeeling sees the GNLF spring back into action after a while now.
11. Fedex and Sampras played three exhibition matches around Asia [Seoul, Kuala Lumpur and Macau]. Fedex won the first two - they were pretty tight matches though they were both straight set wins [6-4, 6-3 and 7-6, 7-6]. And then Pistol Pete, balding ever so slowly, took home the third. Another tight match with the first set tie-breaker going to 10-8, and then 6-4. Experts and laymen are all agreed that in current form, Sampras could be in today's top 5 in the men's world rankings. Yayyyyy! Sampras quietly shooed away any hopes of coming back into competitive playing. [Full BBC story on the third match.]
8. Yet another Middle-East peace conference scheduled to be held in Annapolis. Yawn.
9. I had a farewell party thrown in my honour at darling Titla's place o Saturday. There was biryani, there was Cranium, there were friends and there were new friends. I got a super MP3 from a Ryanotaurus, earrings from an Annettie, Fab clothes from Doc Iqbal, jvellries from a Thirtha and a losing place in Cranium on account of some very shite luck. Whatte fun it was! Pics up soon.

Good Grief.

India won the 4th match and clinched the ODI series with their victory over Pakistan yesterday. The scores are now 3-1 in favour of the Men in Blue and all indications are that it might even be 4-1 once India is through outplaying the visitors in the final match at Jaipur.
Thank God I was travelling and missed most of the painful scenes. I managed to catch Tendulkar's half-century at the airport and was very glad to see it. He's a babe, as I certainly have not hesitated in mentioning before and often and anon. On landing, I heard that the poor guy was out on 97. Oh nooooooo, not again!!!! What's going on with that?
Anyway, India fully deserved this win. From reliable sources watching the match, I heard it looked all to easy ["Child's play" was the direct quote] and if you can manage that, then the opponents aren't worthy of a win.
Yuvraj and Dhoni once again wrapped up proceedings. Their consistency as finishers is astounding.
So well done, India, and Shame, shame, puppy shame, Pakistan.
Nice writeup on cricinfo as usual. Here's a quote:
"Pakistan lost the series today, to Tendulkar's majesty, but for all intents and purposes, it was the uncertainty and instability around the team since Shoaib Malik's captaincy began, that lost it for them."
And, "That fizz, that unique Pakistani mirch (spice) has been absent, leaving a very bland taste in the mouth."
This is too true.
The Yo-Yo combination worked again for Pakistan [Yousuf-99*, Younis 68] but two men a match cannot win esp if you ask them to do it over and over and over again. This happens to be a team sport. Team = More than two players. Oh, forget it. I'm done.

Vote for Imran Khan! The Imandaar Khan!*

Who can blame me for falling in love with Pak cricket?


I don't get the Creed background music, but whatever.
If Imran becomes Pak prez, I think that will be the end of Indo-Pak hostilities. Who can NOT like the drooly Khan?

*Title edited on account of no one except the Great Kinky noticing my witty word-play. Pah. Kinkminos, tussi great ho. Val done, bwoiz.

Whooopeeee deflated...

Gaaaaak. Pakistan lost today. Almost a miserable loss, by 46 runs no less.
Immediate caustic comments from "friends" overseas in the Gelf:
"awwwwwwwwwww what a sad...Pakistan lost again hehehe
WOOhooo..............Go India!."
[Skinny, that's you. Hmmmph.]

I hate this pendulum swinging of my moods based on match results. I was feeling really great after the equalizer on Thursday, and now it's back to grumpy and sullen again till the next match and its result. I must take tranquilizers in the interim. Or anything to deaden the senses. In fact, it might not be too bad an idea to down a lot of Valium even on the actual days of play. The emotional roller coaster is a bit much.
After the T20 debacle, our help Lakshmi would dust around me and lift me up in her left hand to sweep underneath me with her right because I would lie lifeless and inert with a glazed, befuddled, tragic look on my visage. It was nice of her to not laugh at me to my face.

So. About today's match.
There's no excusing Pakistan. India outplayed the Greenies in all departments, especially their batting. That applause-worthy partnership between hot-rods Dhoni and Yuvraj was something else. Great start by the old school prefects, Sachin and Gangs. Once they were out, it looked like Pakistan might claw their way back in but no, no. Captain and vice-cap waltzed in, gave the ball a good talking to all around the stadium and put India back in the driver's seat.
Paki bowlers cleaned up a few wickets in the end, but it was too late.
The average score at Kanpur has been 225, and India managed 294 for 6. Pak hoped sending Mental Afridi up in the front might help and for the first over it seemed okay. But then the paagal Pathan decided he wanted to go across the line again and completely missed the India Pathan's good in-line delivery. Bah! Good riddance.

Huge round of applause for the brilliant Salman Butt. He came in at the beginning and gave us some dredges of hope till the very end of the innings but wickets on the other side fell with a ridiculous casualness. A beautifully played 129, his highest ODI score yet. Who the hell will Pak find to open alongside him? Ye gods.

It's 2-1 now, and all eyes will be on Gwalior on the 15th when the4th ODI takes place. Match starts 1430 IST. It's a day-nighter.

Fingers crossed, hopes weighed down deliberately with king-sized anvil.

Whooopeeeee! [Not the cushion. Not the actress.]

Fantastic, thrilling match at Mohali this Thursday! It all came down to the last over again, and, as is Pakistan's wont, they kept us on tenterhooks till the last minute with a gripping, uncertain, will-they-won't-they display on the field. Egads. The adrenaline rush. The pillows torn apart. The continuous durood-shareefs sent upwards. The unladylike shrieks and inward cusses. [Okay, some outward.]
Had Pakistan lost this match after coming so close to winning again, there would be no more posts to read on this blog because I would have passed on to the next world with a shattered heart and a fixed grimace of unbearability etched on my mug.
Thank the Lord it wasn't so. We are now standing at one-all and here on, anything can happen.
It was a very T20-finals sort of situation and feel at Mohali. And when Misbah played 'that shot' again, on 49, to get bowled behind his bum, I thought, 'This does not portend well." All indications leaned Indian-victory-wards. Hurrah for Afridi and Sohail Tanvir. They provided real fireworks when required.
My hero of the day is of course Younis Khan. I love this man. I love his style of play. I love that he can infuriate the bowler and viewer alike with a refusal to get out as well as a refusal to up the run rate, and then just when all seems lost and the required run rate looks unattainable, he swings into action and is scoring at more than run-a-ball. Onward to a century, and taking your side to a comfy posish. *Mwuaaaaaaah*But I shan't discount Misbah. He played a dream as well and so what if he can't finish, he always plays the coolest, bravest, sauciest in a tense situation when all seems lost. He's done it time and again and one cannot forget that.
And then the dolls that are Mad Afridi and Sohail Tanvir stepped in and finished the match in style. When Afridi came in to bat, Pakistan needed 46 off 28 to win and every ball was a terror to watch. With this guy at the crease, you never know. All could have ended. But he struck gold yesterday, along with some fine fours and a smashing six which I caught from in between my fingers placed firmly over my eyes. When Yuvi dropped that second catch at mid-on, I believe I might have peed in my pants. [I didn't, shaddup!]. Sohail Tanvir, well done again.
One ball to spare, no nails left to chew on, frantic pleas to the Almighty to send some Divine Droplets Pakistan's way, and woooo hoooooo! Or, as the title song goes, Whooopeeeee! They did it!
Captain [hmmph] Shoaib Malik played well as he always does. There's no criticising him with the bat or on the field or when bowling. He's a brilliant all-rounder. He's a nice, young lad. He looked to be a good captain at the T20s because there isn't much you can do there. The pace of the match decides most things and in any case, nothing runs to plan in that short version of the game. In a full-length ODI, Shoaib always looks out of sorts as a captain. He does absolutely nothing that makes one nod and say a la Ajit Loin, "Smart bvaaii." (Like Dhoni, say.)
Malik is the extreme opposite of animated. He looks downright worried when his bowlers are getting pummelled. [I mean, look, this is Pakistan. Pummelling WILL happen.] I don't know, I am just not happy with him at the helm of things. Younis Khan is a brilliant, chirpy, active, fun vice captain. He's smart in that he refused captaincy, but he would have been really good there. I do not understand why Mohd Yousuf isn't made captain, or apna mental Afridi. Yousuf is unarguably one of the finest batsmen in the world today. And Afridi one of the top all-rounders. Both have tons of experience. Afridi of course looks more happy to lead and the only thing going against him is he doesn't think. Distinct lack of calm in the face of anything. And Mohd Yousuf is probably too calm. Oh, there you go. I suppose that DOES leave only Shoaib. Latest official announcement: Shoaib's tenure as captain of Pakistan has been extended by one more year by the PCB.
Anyway, back to the match. Salman Butt is a great opener and he's always played well against India. He scores at a healthy pace and plays really beautifully. Pak really needs to find someone else to open well with him. Kamran looked very sloppy with both sets of gloves- the wicket-keeping as well as batting ones. Also unimpressive was Rao Iftikhar. He got slapped around the field and his shoulders and mouth drooped pretty early on in the day. I mean, you can't give up the fight, wot? On the positive side, Shoaib came good, Umar Gul continued his fine form and... Who cares!!! Pakistan won.
Just a little disconcerting to watch Mohd Yousuf so out of sorts yesterday. It doesn't matter. He's a babe.
Now, on to India.
Poor, poor darling Sachin. Unbelievably tragic. Very good for Umar Gul but aaarrrgh! I feel for Sachin. He's such a brilliant, likable player. Thrice in three months! 22nd time in the nineties. If we feel so terrible for him, what must he be going through? *sends virtual commiserations and standing ovation for his excellent 99 off 91*. I really thought it was all over when him and Gambhir were pasting the ball around the stadium.
No one else did much for India except Bhajji with his nutso blitzkrieg at the end. If it weren't for him, it might have been a cakewalk for Pakistan. Ganguly did a good job with the ball.

Tomorrow is another day. Match 3 at Kanpur, starts at 9am local time. We are primed and ready. Pak supporters have gathered at our house. Here we go... May the best team win, but more importantly, let it be another tight match, whichever way it swings.

Stupid cricket match and a lovely cafe called BrewHaHa

First ODI between India and Pakistan at Guwahati, Nov 5th, 2007.
Match summary: "It was a tired, dull effort on a sluggish surface."
-Siddhartha Vaidyanathan on cricinfo.com

A yawn-inspiring match between the two teams that always promise excitement and drama when playing each other. Except it wasn't so at all yesterday.
India won deservedly as Pakistan handed the match over to the Indians in a super-slo-mo turn of events. The Paki bowling and fielding was so ho-hum I won't write about it. A couple of upsides: Salman Butt looks in good nick, as does Mohd Yousuf. Downsides: Too many to list in detail but the broad outlines may read as 'bowling' and 'fielding'. How many times will Mohd Yousuf try and save the day only to have the rest of the Greenie Meanies turn it into a shambles?
Am very disappointed in Shoaib Malik's captaincy or lack thereof. Maybe he was thinking about the Emergency situation back home? Probably not, but what the hell was he thinking of otherwise is my question.
More amusement was in store for all viewers as Afridi got out in yet another comical attempt at bludgeoning the ball. (You nutty Pathan, keep your panties on for a while, why don't you?) Afridi's full-stretch lunge from toe to extreme-tip-of-bat measured in at 57 feet, 8 inches. At least that was what it looked like. He missed the ball by a further 3'5" feet and the math becomes too depressing now to give a final cumulative of the asinine act. Oh, well, at least he didn't waste too many balls and livened things up a bit. 31 off 32 is a fun show.
On the Indian side, good bowling esp by the spinners. Sachin is a hero and a good man and both were on display yesterday. Couldn't contribute with the bat? No problem. He stepped in with his cute smile and a couple of important wickets. Stop dissing Sachin all the time, folks, really. And Sourav. There's a reason they're counted amongst the greats. And both showed it yesterday.
Dhoni is firmly entrenching himself in my heart of hearts as a really nice lad and a good cricketer. Consistency is not something to be sneered at. Yuvi did good again.
All in all, an infuriating day for me as I watched the ease with which India took the match away. Obviously batting in the middle orders wasn't too tough, Pakis, because India did just fine. Hmmmph.
Later on in the evening, as a salve on my wounds, I cleverly met up with a couple of my girlfriends who couldn't care less about the cricket. In this intelligent manner, I avoided being ridiculed for supporting Pakistan and also enjoyed thoroughly at a very nice cafe in Koramangala called Brew HaHa. (Right next to Jyoti Nivas College.)

Let me talk a bit about this joint. I give it 4.4 out of 5 thumbs up. I have been to Brew thrice already and have really enjoyed each time. The cafe was started by a couple of friends: one Mr Sreeram and one Mr Mansur. More about them here. The menu is great, the food is lovely, very budget place and an easy, fun ambience.
Brew-Ha-Ha is built around the concept of gaming and fun. (Which is to say indoor 'games', of the board kind and 'fun' of the clean, family atmosphere kind.) Games available include Scrabble, Coda, Cranium, Pictionary and over 60 other games most of which I hadn't heard of. The walls are also mounted with white board for added fun and creativity. Ask for the games menu and learn a few new things.
The cafe has ample seating: tables-and-chairs as well as floor-rug-seating in the corners with cushions/bolsters for your use and pleasure.
The place is boisterous and noisy during the day when college kids bunk and come away to enjoy a few innocent hours. On a weekday evening, it'll be quiet and pleasant.
The menu itself is very diverse, with a lot of choice available in terms of food as well as beverages. And very amusing names for many of the menu items, inspired by comic book or popular fiction.
Yesterday I had the Roast Chicken, Mayo and Apple Sandwich (with a special request to not add the apples in- yes, I can be like that) and the Willie Wonka Cappuccino [a dreamy mochachino - really excellent]. My friend had a Paneer Tikka Sandwich plus a Cappuccino and another friend the Oriental Stir Fried Noodles and a Lime Water. All of us concurred on these points: The food was excellent, the servings generous. Beverages were top-notch as well. Add to this the great pricing and we were a much-satisfied threesome.
Service was friendly and only a tiny bit slow, but this went unnoticed because we had a really good time in totum. The desserts look appealing as well. Their cheese cake is fantastic. Last time I was there I had a huge slab and packed another one to take home with me.
The next time I go to the cafe, I intend to try the Intergalactic Gargle Blaster. And maybe something from the pasta menu. I'm pretty confident I'll be happy with whatever I order. I have been reading random reviews of the place online and it's unanimous: everyone has enjoyed their food at Brew-Ha-Ha. Not a single unhappy critique.
My friends and I have decided we will patronise this joint like no one else. Here's to time and money well spent and the promise of a lot more of the same.

Highly recommend for a bit of old-school-memories fun. Go!

Good read

A super article by Siddartha Mishra on the upcoming Indo-Pak cricket series in the Times of India [surprise, surprise] a few days ago.
Here's an excerpt:
"In 9 ODIs versus India in India, Yousuf averages no more than 26; and his 6 Tests here have fetched him 34.27 runs per innings. The corresponding averages for Younis oscillate between 16 (5 ODIs) and an eye-popping 101.60 (3 Tests). Clearly, Yo-Yo - a term coined to refer to Pakistan’s two best batsmen in conjunction - isn’t only about the smart use of alphabets."
Oh, but it is, Mr Mishra. You use your alphabets very smartly.
The entire article is gripping, intelligent and erm, nice.

A gorgeous pic of my two hot favorites, Yo-Yo as it were. [When Yousuf didn't have that beard, he was also a hottie. Still is, metaphysically speaking.]

Pak cricket, jokes about

A wonderful post on AMAR AKBAR ANTHONY. On three of my favorite topics: cricket, the Paki cricket team and Islam. And hilarious to boot.
(For persons without a sense of humor, write me for a pinch of salt.)

Personal opinion(s):
I love that picture.
I think the Pak players are grown-up and professional enough to decide for themselves how to balance their deen and their job. Shoaib Malik's strange post-defeat comment notwithstanding. [I never said "articulate enough to say it right". Just grown-up and professional.]

Six days to go. Madness and mayhem.

Tee hee. Why not?

Pakistan's tour of India kicks off officially on Nov 5th at Guwahati. There is a warm-up match in Delhi on Friday, though. (As if we won't be watching that.)
Here's the schedule

• Monday, Nov 5, 2007 : 1st ODI at Guwahati
• Thursday, Nov 8, 2007 (D/N) : 2nd ODI at Mohali
• Sunday, Nov 11, 2007 : 3rd ODI at Kanpur
• Thursday, Nov 15, 2007 (D/N) : 4th ODI at Gwalior
• Sunday, Nov 18, 2007 (D/N) : 5th ODI at Jaipur
• Thursday, Nov 22-26, 2007 : 1st Test at Delhi
• Friday, Nov 30 - Dec 4, 2007 : 2nd Test at Kolkata
• Saturday, Dec 8-12, 2007 : 3rd Test at Bangalore

Who's coming to watch the test in Bangalore? Wheee. Raise hands and then email your petitions to me.

General info: Very expensive stadium tickets available from the globalticketservice website.
I know I can't afford them.

Meanwhile, the ICC has announced the officials who will keep the troops in check after the battles commence.
Match referee for the ODIs: Roshan Mahanama [I like]
Match referee for the tests: Ranjan Madugalle
Umps: Ian Gould, Billy Doctrove and local appointments- for the ODIs
Simon Taufel, Billy Bowden, Billy Doctrove - for the tests

Farewell, Inzy

And very extremely well done, and hats off and curtseys and a huge standing ovation. I [heart] you.


I know I'm going to miss this giant when I watch Pakistan play now on. (I know you will too, Boomsa.)
From 1991 to 2007, Inzy has enthralled cricket-loving fans worldwide. Thank God for Imran Khan who discovered the lumbering giant and stuck by him for the '92 World Cup, which Inzy was eventually instrumental in winning. And there's been no looking back ever since.

*wipes tears*




Here's the video of his final interview and the chokey scenes with his team after.
Loved it when he says in true Inzy style, "Thenk you, bwoiz."


Some articles from yesterday and today: Pak greats hail Inzy, Irreplaceable Inzy, SA's guard of honour as he stepped in to bat in his final match etc. Many more fitting tributes will come up pretty soon I expect.