V for Veena and Vastanvi

An abbreviated edit of this post appeared in this week's Tehelka mag. Here's the online version. Print also available, I believe. [Can someone hold a copy for me, please? :) I'll collect it when back.]
So here it is.

What a fascinating start to the new year. As a young, relatively serious Muslim, I am naturally interested in news stories and opinions pertaining to Islam. More so in today's climate where Islam is, shall we say, not exactly subject to much praise, or even authentic, objective appraisal.

Which is why it is more than a little disheartening to see two recent big news stories doing the rounds in the subcontinent in this regard, that are so inane and yet reflect so well what is wrong with:

1. the Islamic ummah [community] itself, and
2. the perception of Islam as bandied about by mainstream media and lapped up by everyone.

I speak of the chart-topping story centred around Pakistan's Veena Malik, her Bigg Boss stint and the subsequent outrage it unleashed. [But of course we all know this already.] The second case I refer to is that of Maulana Ghulam Mohammad Vastanvi and the controversy surrounding his statements. Exactly. A lot of you are probably thinking, “Who? What?”, and to save you the trouble of Googling said gentleman, let me introduce Vastanvi saheb as the recently appointed 'Mohtamim' or Rector of the Darul Uloom, Deoband, who has now resigned after a fair bit of noise by 'the good Muslims of India'.

[What is ironic here, from a Muslim P.O.V. is that most regular Muslims don't know and certainly don't care who the rector of the Darul Uloom is – it does not affect our daily lives. On the other hand, all of us are pretty much up to speed on Veena Malik and the sordid details of her private life; she would have been the subject of much discussion in most Muslim households. And therein lies the problem.]

Vaaii? Just because I'm a womaan!!?

Let us take the curious case of Veena Malik first. We all know of the 'slut-shaming' hue and cry Pakistan's media and masses are directing at Veena. We also know of bright, sane voices in Pakistan speaking out against this [MUST READ: Sana Saleem, Shyema Sajjad, Raza Rumi, Urooj Zia etc.] but that's unfortunately not too many in comparison. Here's the thing. The outrage is not limited only to Pakistan. Muslims across the region are taking Veena's behaviour as a personal affront. I can cite examples from my own moderate, well-educated Muslim family and community.

How does Veena Malik's private participation in an entertainment show make her a representative of either her country or her religion? Why are people going hysterical over her actions when it has nothing to do with them? Where does this intrusive, and frankly, very ridiculous Islamic moral policing get off? One's faith is a very personal thing and in the context of Islam specifically, you will never be held responsible for something someone else did, so please back off. 'Nafsi-nafsi' as the saying goes. [Or, to use the vernacular: 'Whose father what goes?'] Veena, in a teary-fiery confrontation with a Mufti Abdul on a recent news show in Pakistan, was spot on when she said what she did is between her God and her. [The same channel called her back for more public bashing the next day, with Pak veteran actor/director Syed Noor and Atiqa Odho - and again Veena stood tall. w00t!] Who is anyone else to butt in and stand on judgement? There are far bigger problems with Islam as practised today than what a starlet/cricketer/actor/politician/academic did in his or her personal life. Unfortunately the point is, that for some reason, Muslims mostly tend to get rubbed the wrong way on all inanities. [This happens with other communities and groups as well, but I am speaking of the Muslim ummah.] First things first. Veena Malik is not an aberration or a shocker, hence need not be made a loud example of. I may not approve of Veena Malik personally but that's my opinion and I cannot foist my judgement on her – more so using the tag of Islam to browbeat her with. I will say this: I now respect her for her courage, for facing up to a most vicious and unfair attack by an unthinking people and for standing up for herself publicly. I thumb my nose at mullahs and all other self-righteous thekedaars of Islam and really, more people need to do so. My simple request to today's Muslim everywhere: look to yourself, mind your own business and do jihad the best way – that is, struggle against your own self. [Before everyone starts panicking, please note: jihad simply means 'struggle' not 'holy war', in the same way that fatwa simply means 'opinion' and not 'death sentence'.]

Abeyaar, WTF did I do?

And now, on to the next segment: Maulana Vastanvi's predicament. In short, all the Maulana really said was that yes, Guajarat 2002 happened, it is now 2011 and since the state as a whole is doing so bloody well economically, it stands to reason that Muslims in the state are also doing okay, there is development and we should take this positive and move ahead. Nothing wrong as far as I can see. No particular eulogy or praises for Narendra Modi or any reference to his being faultless in the riots and general horror of the time. But no! Offence must be taken, outrage must be had. Hot-headed loonies decided that the Gujarat card was being undermined. “Muslims are the victims! Always the victims!” and how dare this forward-thinking, sensible educationist talk about anything else?

Now. Frankly speaking, the Darul Uloom and its administration or opinions don't really figure in a common Muslim's day-to-day life. One does not look to the Darul Uloom for daily guidance or direction. It may be India's most historic and renowned seat of Islamic learning - but is more popularly only known as 'that Muslim joint where they hand out unsavoury fatwas from time to time' [a whole different kettle of fish we can leave for later] by the general populace. Which is to say, that unless Vastanvi's tepid remarks in some interview with, who else, the TOI *insert applause* was not played up and given its current tabloidy-political-communal-controversial tint, none of us could have cared less. There is so much outrage because fragmented and choppy edits and reporting can cause such things. Again, the outrage is only on the part of a few people, and possible has some shady political angle to it which I do not care to go into. That's my point. I don't care what some administrator of some religious body said – especially since it was so neutral and non-news- worthy. Somewhere I see ridiculous media shenanigans in raking up another controversy surrounding Islam-Gujarat-mullahs-Modi. Sure the Deobandis are now screaming bloody murder [not really, but you know], Vastanvi has had to step down as Mohtamim and the issue is still getting acreage in publications when it is all such a big yawn. Here's the thing: was all this necessary? Does it affect the common Muslim in any way if Vastanvi says Gujarat HAS developed under Modi? [Well, hasn't it?] Can we all please stop feeling that Mulsims are still being crushed underfoot when in fact they may be not, and that the events of 2002 were a terribly unique occurrence and not the norm? Muslims – please stop playing the victims when not needed, media- stop your silly news-byte worthy shenanigans. The resulting noise is a bit much.

A closing thought. I am sure there is a significant number of Muslims today who think along reasonable lines, do not fall for every old provocation in the book, know their religion for what it is and do not need to nod along to everything certain clerics and scholars say just because they appear to know better. It is time to stop being a 'silent majority' [as I hope you are] and come out of your shells.

All I can say is, the outrage is outrageous.

Bas, khallaas.

PS:

On a seriously light note, please turn up the volume and watch this hilarious remix tribute video to Veena Malik, created bye DJ Shahrukh. Phrases that we can take away from Veena's epic interview and laugh forever over: Agar-magar?!, jazbaati, bos-o-kinaar, husn-o-jamaal, fohosh, and the epic cultness of “Mufti Sahab! Yeh kya baat hui?!!” 
Which phrase I and many others have already started using with relish in appropriate situations.

Arundhati Roy re possible sedition charge - Oct 26th 2010

Dear all of you,
I am sending this from Srinagar. This is my statement in response to the news that I may be arrested soon on charges of sedition. It would be lovely if the whole statement is carried— which is why I am not sending it to the wire services.
All the best
Arundhati

STATEMENT BY ARUNDHATI ROY

I write this from Srinagar, Kashmir. This morning’s papers say that I may be arrested on charges of sedition for what I have said at recent public meetings on Kashmir. I said what millions of people here say every day. I said what I, as well as other commentators have written and said for years. Anybody who cares to read the transcripts of my speeches will see that they were fundamentally a call for justice. I spoke about justice for the people of Kashmir who live under one of the most brutal military occupations in the world; for Kashmiri Pandits who live out the tragedy of having been driven out of their homeland; for Dalit soldiers killed in Kashmir whose graves I visited on garbage heaps in their villages in Cuddalore; for the Indian poor who pay the price of this occupation in material ways and who are now learning to live in the terror of what is becoming a police state.

Yesterday I traveled to Shopian, the apple-town in South Kashmir which had remained closed for 47 days last year in protest against the brutal rape and murder of Asiya and Nilofer, the young women whose bodies were found in a shallow stream near their homes and whose murderers have still not been brought to justice. I met Shakeel, who is Nilofer’s husband and Asiya’s brother. We sat in a circle of people crazed with grief and anger who had lost hope that they would ever get ‘insaf’—justice—from India, and now believed that Azadi—freedom— was their only hope. I met young stone pelters who had been shot through their eyes. I traveled with a young man who told me how three of his friends, teenagers in Anantnag district, had been taken into custody and had their finger-nails pulled out as punishment for throwing stones.

In the papers some have accused me of giving ‘hate-speeches’, of wanting India to break up. On the contrary, what I say comes from love and pride. It comes from not wanting people to be killed, raped, imprisoned or have their finger-nails pulled out in order to force them to say they are Indians. It comes from wanting to live in a society that is striving to be a just one. Pity the nation that has to silence its writers for speaking their minds. Pity the nation that needs to jail those who ask for justice, while communal killers, mass murderers, corporate scamsters, looters, rapists, and those who prey on the poorest of the poor, roam free.

Arundhati Roy

October 26 2010

I, Kashmiri

Hindustan Times kindly asked me to write a personal opinion piece on Kashmir. It was published on Sunday, September 11 (!!!), 2010.
Most of you've read it. Here's the link for the rest.

[Awesome comments of course. :) Like 'leave Kashmir' suggestion. Read for amusement.]

PS: This is not the personal blog post on Kashmir I had talked about earlier ['Kashmir, Let's Talk']. That's going to be much lengthier, more detailed and with no real structure as such. I'll try and address all comments as well. Coming up...

Kashmir. Let's Talk.

[EDIT : Waiting esp. for response to Point 4. Please contact. Thanks.]















So... The 'situation' in J&K has gone from bad to obscenely terrible in a period of two months. Death toll of unarmed protesters nearing 60 (or has it crossed already?), most victims of bullet shots from the CRPF and other 'security forces'- above the waist, below the damn waist, who cares. Not a single tangible action from the State/Indian Govt to admit the wrongness of what has occurred. No restraint orders, no pulling up of guilty personnel, no apology to the people even? Oh, hang on, sorry. We have to wait about 20 years for an apology or anything like it.

Anyway, am planning a big post on my take on Kashmir.

Off the top of my head, I'll get into the following: [EDIT: Below points are a way ahead. How the problem ought to be solved. The detailed post will make clearer where I'm coming from.]
1. Kashmir is a political problem, NOT a religious one.
2. Unfortunately, a lot of people (who make the most noise as well) WILL make it a religious issue.
3. Is this communalising of Kashmir its biggest tragedy? Yes. Thank you, Britain, for the Partition and the never-ending mess you unleashed. (Let's blame them!)
4. I am really, really interested in talking with with serious, level-headed, non-combative Kashmiri Pandits - about everything. Get in touch with me, please?
5. Kashmir cannot be compared to Indian states, because it is a completely unique issue.
6. Non-Kashmiris who have not lived here REALLY have no idea, as well-intentioned as you may be.
7. Elections: 60% voter turnout in recent elections does NOT indicate acceptance of  Indian statehood. Ugh. Ask me, I voted. And now my neighbourhood has good roads, yay. How about this: people need a local administration to run things well for a change - that's schools, colleges, hospitals, roads, electricity, water and what have you.
8. Plebiscite? Where is it? Oh, yes.
9. YOUTH: Get together. Sanely. Please. So far, everyone's made a mess of things. Let's get organised and talk.



Incidentally, here's one book I read years ago: Tavleen Singh's 'Kashmir: A Tragedy of Errors'. Can't comment on it intelligently, I was too young to critique. All I remember is it was interesting.
Here's Vinayak Razdan's take on the book. (His blog is much too interesting, I say. Recommended.)

Oh, one more thing about the Kashmir problem: Books won't help much.

Lahore, March 3, and it's India v. Pakistan again

As expected, the blog scene across the globe has been pulsating with the news of the incredibly tragic attack on the Sri Lankan cricket team in Lahore yesterday.
Here's Simply61, an Indian blogger with sense in the right proportions.
And here's Pak Tea House.
Also as expected, blogs by Indians or Pakistanis on the subject have led to a flood of comments by readers from both sides of the border, which comments then take on a life of their own and soon spiral down into the usual mess of bashing the other's country /beliefs / politics and what have you. So we see the familiar and mindless accusations of extremist Islam, Talibanisation, Hindu fanaticism, Muslim-ghettoing, State-sponsored ethnic cleansing, Church-destroying, nun-raping, priest-killing, Dalit sidelining, honour killing, school burning, beheading etc. doing the rounds...
What is it with India and Pakistan? Or rather, with the common Indian and Pakistani youth? (This is the demographic that is active on blogs.) For a longish time I held firmly to my belief that, "No, no, it's all good. The average Indian Raju or Pakistani Pappu bears no ill-will to his neighbour . It only seems that way in the movies, media and among hard-right politicians."
But the unfortunate fact is that this is not so. Can't say about Pakistan, but I've lived in India for over 10 years now and all my friends are Indians. For every sane and tolerant voice I hear among these my sensible friends, I hear and see many more intolerant, hateful, angry voices that bear malice towards Pakistan. I'm pretty sure it must be the same on the other side.
And why? None of the youth today have any real attachement with the Partition Era or the tragedy that unfolded then. Where is all this Hate-Thy-Neighbour sentiment coming from? I fail to understand. This feeling is never more evident than, ironcally, during a Pak-India cricket match. I need to wear ear-muffs to drown out the name-calling at such times. Why for?

I can distance myself from India- or Pak-bashing since, being a Kashmiri, I have the luxury of not belonging to either. (On the other hand, I'm equiliberal in India- or Pak-bashing when I see an injustice from either side. I'm not blind, I'm just more objective.)

What I really don't get is that overwhelming feeling of patriotism/nationalism/call it what you will, that takes a person to such a level of self-righteousness that he feels he is superior to anyone else. Because that is what nationalism is. A fierce pride that convinces you within your man-made borders that you are better than the other.
I reject nationalism outright. No 'nationalism' for me. I will judge people by their actions and intentions, wherever they may be from, and extrapolate that for Governments too.

And the moral of the story, based on this theory above, must be that the US Government sucks. :)

Cartoons flicked from Nicholson Cartoons and CartoonStock.com.

Pakistan, India, Kashmir, Elections, Nonsense and other things.

Important opinions I have on various subjects which the world just can't do without. In no particular order then:
1. Elections over in Kashmir, and I fail to understand why India is turning cartwheels with elation. To see the turnout in the state elctions as a thumping acceptance of India is oh-so-naive. To make it very clear to the general public, here's Kashmiri sentiment in a simple line: Not pro-India, not pro-Pakistan, very pro-autonomy/independence. As was the case many happy years ago when we had our own national anthem, flag, peace and no nonsense about 'my religion vs. yours' doing the rounds. Elections have done nothing to change that feeling. [NDTV has taken a great spin on it with its 'separatism' vs. 'separatists' line. I find it infinitely amusing to watch non-Kashmiris take stances on the situish in Kashmir as if owning the place was a birthright and the preference of the Kashmiri people was a trifle that could be ignored. This cuts across both borders.] What we say is, "Excuse me, if you aren't Kashmiri, stop speaking." C'est ridicule, non? (Ooh. Except if you agree with us.:)
People came out in healthy numbers to vote this time because they want to live under some sort of clean, organised governance. So the idea was, vote for your own people to form an efficient administration. If they didn't vote they'd get a few more years of no basic amenities: 'bijli, sadak, pani' and schools. Education and everything else here still is in pretty bad shape but whatever little there is of it seems to have opened the eyes of the general public some. In any case, this was the first time I have been witness to so much brouhaha over elections in my lifetime. Even kids here were so into it. Folks took the day off and travelled across the state to wherever they were on the voters list. Everyone voted. Not me though. :( I didn't know which voter list I was on. InshaAllah, next time.
2. Pakistan is being silly with its denial post 26/11. It almost verges on ridiculous when it claims to not have any knowledge of unappetising activities in its territory. (I mean, I'm Kashmiri. I KNOW. *rolls eyes*) Sure Pakistan is also the victim of terrorist acts every now and then, but the fact of the matter is, when have the terrorists ever turned out to be from India? They're homegrown mostly. So stop pointing the finger back at India as defense. It's stupid. Poor folks of Pakistan. Are you embarassed by your government? I am. And why is taht Zardadri dude always grinning so scarily? Is he blotto all the time? The rest of the suits are all glum and solemn-looking and he's beaming like glare off the snow.
3. Then. Kashmir on its own: It disturbs me so much to see the moral fibre completely missing in an entire generation of our people, and its trickle-down effect across the state. I speak mostly of the previous generation, my parents' time. These are the folks who have had the reigns of government in Kashmir for the past few decades and the level of corruption, thievery, dishonesty and laziness in-built into the 'system' is astounding. The amount of money that has gone into the pockets of a very few (who then build big mansions in Jammu or Srinagar) while the rest of the people languish in poverty, unemployment and helplessness is very shameful. I know a lot of these peeps myself. My extended family is filled with them. It's taken as a matter of course here this dirty way of life and to try and get something done the straight way, through rules and regulations and processes is almost a joke. We come back to morals, ethics and a sense of right and wrong, and it's clearly missing here. The fear going ahead is that these rich buggers who have the reign of administration in their filthy hands have now passed on the same spineless character and way-of-life to their spoilt young kids, who will also eventually end up inheriting their parents' prestigious posts in government. It's an ugly cycle. On the other hand, I see many young, poor, hard-working kids who seem to have got it right and are making things happen on their own merit. Will this blessed lot be able to do any good? Or will they not be able to get that foot in the door because they don't happen to know the right people. Bleak, I say. I am so glad my folks and us lived in Dubai for a very long time and were not privy to this sickness. We have a nice house, and we've built it on purely halal money. Yay.

4. More on Kashmir. The primarily Islamic nature of life and our culture and how I have witnessed its revival in the past two decades. Say what you will about militancy and the 'Kashmir issue', if nothing else, Islam has started coming back to the people. Going back to the useless previous generation, it's quite clear that they had lost their Imaan in overwhelming form. Whereas, in the past 20 or so years, most everyone, especially the younger lot, have taken a shine to religion again. I can see this in my own family and in my town and village. (This is possibly true of non-Muslims in the region as well but I can't be a reliable source.) Anyway, it's a good thing. I mean, we'll have our fanatics and hardcore religious-pokey-noses, but for the most part, it's worth it. Ignore the small section of nuts and look at the bigger picture.

What am I going on about? Ranting to continue at a later time and place. Am tired.

Bush: It's Shoe Time!

What a pick-me-up on the news yesterday. The whole family laughed deep and loud from our bellies after a long-time.
Iraqi journo Muntadar al-Zaidi (Saab singing "Tu mera hero hai..." to man on left) let loose two good ones but Monkey Man dodged both. Damn. Maybe someone else can try elsewhere. A new trend has begun!
(Can you imagine what Bush will now feel before taking the podium at any press conference? As if he wasn't shifty-looking enough already.)

Anyway, here's the video. Enjoy.

Mumbai: 26/11

Arundhati Roy with another gripping read: http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2008/dec/12/mumbai-arundhati-roy. (Thanks for the link, Sir Fahad.)
Ms Roy mentions something that hit me and my folks here in Kashmir during the long hours we followed the TV broadcasts. Here's an excerpt:
"Over three days and three nights we watched in disbelief as a small group of very young men armed with guns and gadgets exposed the powerlessness of the police, the elite National Security Guard and the marine commandos of this supposedly mighty, nuclear-powered nation. While they did this they indiscriminately massacred unarmed people, in railway stations, hospitals and luxury hotels, unmindful of their class, caste, religion or nationality. (Part of the helplessness of the security forces had to do with having to worry about hostages. In other situations, in Kashmir for example, their tactics are not so sensitive. Whole buildings are blown up. Human shields are used. The U.S and Israeli armies don't hesitate to send cruise missiles into buildings and drop daisy cutters on wedding parties in Palestine, Iraq and Afghanistan.) But this was different. And it was on TV."

Exactly. This sort of an 'encounter' would be over in half a day here in Kashmir. Hostages/civilians be damned. Blow up the damn block if you must. But it's easier to just set the building on fire, if you ask me. Okay, let's do that.
Then. Ms Roy makes a mention of one Arnab Goswami, which was a pleasant surprise in a bitter sort of way. This man has infuriated me from the time he's been given that front-runner role for TIMES NOW. (Blehh.) Frothing and foaming at the mouth any time there's a big, dramatic news incident. Check him out in any of TIMES NOW's news broadcasts of a terror attack or a kid stuck in a well, or when interviewing a subject he doesn't like. I've seen him go into scary, straining falsettos of diatribe when he's primed for it. And spouting personal opinion instead of reporting objectively. Well done, Goswami. Where did you learn journalism?

In other news.

Good Gawde has just reminded me that I haven't been keeping my vast readership up to date with various developments in my life and my very important opinions on events transpiring across the world. I thank him. All four of my readers also thank him. Especially Ma. And Pa. ;)

First things first. Get well soon, BB. That stomach trouble you've been having is causing trepidation across the globe. Your legion of admirers is on tenterhooks, biting their finger and toe-nails in an atmosphere of uncertainty and anxiety. Bu chuss yehai dapan ki tsu gess gasun jald nish jald theek. Booz-thha? Shaabaash.

And now on to more public topics. The Turkish GP yesterday. What a fantastic race! Finally a really exciting watch after oh-so-many races.We've had few and far between. The Brazilian GP to wind things up last season in October was a thriller. Then the season-opener in Melbourne this year was entertainng. And after a couple of boring months, yesterday's great race in Istanbul. Well done, little Massa. And Hammie, just when I had lost all hope in you, you took it up one notch and drove a damn good race. The 'Surpise!' three-pit-stop strategy almost worked. Very well done. Kimi stormed in third, close on Hammie's heels. Poor Heikki. Had an unlucky race but some nice overtaking moves all along after his 'flat' start. And Alonso.... *sigh*... Let us take a moment to daydream about this wonderful Spaniard. He was tres bien as usual. And coming up next is the wonderful Monaco GP. Woo hooooo!

On to the IPL now. Started off with a bang in Bangalore, and the tempo's been good ever since. Bangalore's team is by far the biggest joke this tournament's thrown up. Mmmppfhfhppphhhh. *That's muffled laughter*. Tired and Test-ed, is what the Royal Challengers are all about. The Saab is gunning for Dhoni's Chennai Superkings and Delhi's Daredevils (a lot of which has to do with Akshay 'hubba-hubba' Kumar being their posterboy.... I am not ashamed of this fact. I can't help it.) Other teams that look good are of course Warne's Jaipur lads. And Kolkata has a few very bright sparks in the form of Saurav Da and an impressive bowling line-up: Ishant Sharma, Umar Gul, Dinda and possibly, Shoaib Actor, no, no!, Akhtar. (Thanks to Sir Khurram Abbas in the Amreeka for this moniker.)

And then! Soccer. ManuU have romped home with the Barclays English Premier League cup. Whatte! Waiting for Moscow where they'll hopefully make it a double and win the Champions League as well. Chelsea were kicking up a happy storm last night when they saw a faint light at the end of the tunnel with their goal against Bolton. If Man U drew, that would be it. As it turned out though, the Wanderers pulled out a gorgeous equaliser themselves and Chelsea was left undone. Ronaldo had a foot in this winning match as well, and thanks to Rooney, Giggsy pulled off a nice second goal towards the end of the match. And that wrapped it up for the Reds.

In other news, looks like Barack Obama's going to be it. Unless the law suddenly changes and it turns out Dubya can run for another term. In which case it's probable that America will reinstate him as Prez. Ho hum.

And on the other side of the fence...

Is Pakistan saved for a new reigny day? A look-see through the eyes of one Kinky.

The Start of Small Things

Oh. My. God.

Inna lillaahi wa inna ilaihi raaji'un.
"We are from Allah and to Him we are returning."


Benazir Bhutto (21 June, 1953 - 27 December, 2007)

I may not have repected her politics, but I did admire her as a woman and for being able to carry off the 'female leader in Pakistan' tag with such aplomb. In retrospect, I don't much care for all the bad she and her hubby might have done. What do I know?
I am deeply, deeply disturbed by Benazir's passing. She was a big part of my wonder years [mostly through the media and a little through our Paki friends]. And in Dubai, she was always big news along with Lady Di and Charles. This is just tragic.
Rest in peace, you charismatic minx.
What's going to be the fallout in troubled Pakistan now? Fingers are already pointed at Busharraf but come on, that would be too obvious, wouldn't it? No to Nawaz! He's a true creep. I want my Paki readers to let us in on the lowdown. What, or rather, who next? Mr Kinks?

In the meanwhile....

(Meaning the week and more that I was out of action - interesting news items of interest not in chronological order)
1. Pakistan won the penultimate and utterly useless final ODI, garnering a face-saving 3-2 scoreline. Hah. Big deal.
2. Imran Khan was released.
3. Nandigram became uglier and uglier and now it's par for the course so expect it'll move to Page 8 or 10 of the dailies soon.
4. Synchronised triple blast in UP, some b@$-turds taking innocent lives again for another incomprehensible motive.
5. India wins first test at Kotla easily. Kumble shines as captain, Tendulkar shines as always, Shoaib whines as always. Well, okay, he didn't whine. I'm a pissed fan. I can say anything. I'm waiting for hi to grow up into a captain. And I really think he should eat more. He looks near-death.
6. Saab in Bangalore researches life in Mumbai and readies self for the big Heave-Ho.
7. Pakistan still simmers under Busharraff's dictation.
8. Taslima Onscreen in another silly controversial attack-escape routine.
9. Kolkata sees fire.
10. Darjeeling sees the GNLF spring back into action after a while now.
11. Fedex and Sampras played three exhibition matches around Asia [Seoul, Kuala Lumpur and Macau]. Fedex won the first two - they were pretty tight matches though they were both straight set wins [6-4, 6-3 and 7-6, 7-6]. And then Pistol Pete, balding ever so slowly, took home the third. Another tight match with the first set tie-breaker going to 10-8, and then 6-4. Experts and laymen are all agreed that in current form, Sampras could be in today's top 5 in the men's world rankings. Yayyyyy! Sampras quietly shooed away any hopes of coming back into competitive playing. [Full BBC story on the third match.]
8. Yet another Middle-East peace conference scheduled to be held in Annapolis. Yawn.
9. I had a farewell party thrown in my honour at darling Titla's place o Saturday. There was biryani, there was Cranium, there were friends and there were new friends. I got a super MP3 from a Ryanotaurus, earrings from an Annettie, Fab clothes from Doc Iqbal, jvellries from a Thirtha and a losing place in Cranium on account of some very shite luck. Whatte fun it was! Pics up soon.

Oops.

Speaking of jinxed minxes, Imran Khan is arrested in Lahore.
Hang on now. Keep your panties on. It's only house arrest. No chakki peesing and peesing within teen deewaarein.
Reuters has a video of the arrest, which took place at a student rally where Khan finally reemerged today after giving the authorities a slip at the beginning of the Emergency. Doesn't he look so bleddy good?

Vote for Imran Khan! The Imandaar Khan!*

Who can blame me for falling in love with Pak cricket?


I don't get the Creed background music, but whatever.
If Imran becomes Pak prez, I think that will be the end of Indo-Pak hostilities. Who can NOT like the drooly Khan?

*Title edited on account of no one except the Great Kinky noticing my witty word-play. Pah. Kinkminos, tussi great ho. Val done, bwoiz.

Sitchwayshun is grim

The neighbours are having trouble. I have no informed opinion because I have no real information. Meaning I know not so I'll stay quiet. What I glean from Paki friends on the ground [where else, Saab, where else?] is that Musharraf is a bum. But only some voices like Kinkminos here. More noise needed.
The BBC has, as usual, good coverage of this story.
And some nostalgic Gulf News fare on the subject.

The Jena Six

I started reading up on the Jena Six issue only after I came across a post on Umar Lee's blog. Strange that there has been no news coverage of the Jena Six around here. Disturbing even. Are we turning insular like the Americans [yes, I WILL generalize]? MORE.
This is not a story set in the times of the Civil War or a historic anomaly. These are events that have unfolded in present day America, Deep South or not being irrelevant. See here for another related article.
Most disturbing points that stand out:
1. We learn of blatant Black-White segregation even today, in a high school in Jena, a small town in Louisiana.
2. Black students had to ask the principal permission to sit under the shade of a 'White tree'. They do so.
3. The KKK-style noose act by the White students is brushed under the carpet as a 'joke in bad taste.'
4. Black-White tension simmers through the high school for the entire semester. And passes on into the town.
5. A Black student, Robert Bailey, is assaulted at a dance considered to be 'White'. Only one White youth is arrested. He is eventually given probation and asked to apologize.
6. White man pulls a gun on some Black students at a gas station. They wrestle it away from him and get charged with theft. White man goes free.
7. Confrontation between a White student, Justin Barker, and Bailey in school - Bailey is taunted for the attack on him at the dance, and a fray ensues. Barker is allegedly knocked down and beaten by a group of six Black students present at the time of the confrontation.
8. Barker hospitalized for a few hours but seen out and about the same night. No major damage.
9. Six Black students - The Jena Six - allegedly the attackers of Barker, were arrested, charged with attempted manslaughter and expelled from school.
10. The six were arrested in December 2006 with outrageously high bails ranging from USD 70,000 to USD 138,000, leaving all of them unable to post bail for many months.
11. The first student went on trial this June - Mychal Bell. He was tried by an all-White jury, presided on by a White judge.
11. Bell was convicted [big surprise] of two felonies: aggravated second-degree battery and conspiracy to commit second-degree battery and faced up to 22 years in prison.

In light of rising international outcry and the controversy this case has stirred up, there may be hope for the Jena Six yet.
On September 15, a Louisiana court overturned the conviction because Bell shouldn't have been tried as an adult on battery charges in the first place. (Bell was 16 at the time of the arrest.) Major irregularities have already been noted in Bell's trial, such as the public defender not producing a single defense witness..... Some other nonsense about the prosecutor using the argument that Bell's tennis shoes were a 'deadly weapon' and hence justified the charge of aggravated battery. Ye gods.
On September 20, a peaceful rally of more than 10,000 supporters of Jena Six took place in the small town. Among those present were Jesse Jackson, Martin Luther King III, Al Sharpton, Mos Def and Salt n Pepa. Whatever.
Anyway, I'll be watching.

Haaaaaahaaaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaaaaa.......!!!!!

If a picture speaks a thousand words....... I love Nawaz Sharif's expression here.

I'm sorry, I can't help but find this whole deal insanely ridiculous. Not that I'm saying General Busharraf is correct in going against the Pakistan SC's decision etc etc, but he may just have not done the worst thing ever. I mean, really, this is Nawaz Sharif we're talking about. Contrary to what his surname might imply, he's no Angelic Innocent out to salvage Pakistan from the wreckage. He's just another dirty politician in what seems to be an unfortunate never-ending stream of slimeballs in this country's political sphere. [Look at the other alternative: Benazir. Eeks.]

I thoroughly enjoyed various amusing quotes such as this:
"Not long after he arrived from London to cheers from supporters accompanying him on the plane, Sharif was charged with corruption and money-laundering and bundled away by police from the airport VIP lounge. Four hours after landing, he was on a special flight to Saudi Arabia." [msnbc.com]

For sensible reporting on this: Go here.
Which reminds me, I HATE THE TIMES OF INDIA.

Muslims Against Terrorism

And interesting reads on that: Here

Shame...

Outrage. Disgrace. Shame!
Shame on the MIM and a louder, stronger shout-out to the media to perhaps feel some of that shame themselves for once again giving the proceedings a tainted religious hue. [I will explain. This is a long, bilious post.]

Yesterday's nauseating events at the Press Club of Hyderabad during the release of Taslima Nasrin's works in Telugu [who cares what, really] did two things.
One, it reiterated to the whole world that, "Look here, this is what we were saying all along. These Muslims are unbelievable. They really are taking things too far."
Two, it played right into the hands of a constantly-waiting, uneducated media, frothing at the mouth for more dirt on a faith known as Islam. All because a handful of very deluded, unlearned men, ranting and raving like so many Nazi Skinheads or Bajrang Dal activists, claimed their incontrollable outrage in the name of all Muslims. And the ravenous media lapped it up, using allllll the cliches and stereotypes one now expects when anything Islam-bash-worthy happens. *makes violent retching noise*

The facts:
1. Taslima Nasrin was invited to release the translations of her works in Hyderabad.
2. She did so.
3. There was no outrageous attack on Islam, no inflammatory speech and no reading of any derogatory material from her books [if indeed her books have such content].
4. After the event wound to a close, some men[led by our well-chosen, popularly elected, esteemed MLAs] broke into the venue and started their shameful, uncouth, violent histrionics. To wit, a group of full-grown men went berserk and started throwing various items- bouquets, flower pots, even chairs were attempted- at a defenseless Taslima and an oldish man who was visibly hurt during the hurly-burly, bravely standing shield between the deranged macho men and their intended victim. There was no incitement, there was nothing that could have sparked the Fire of Fury in the attackers.
5. Live footage of the attack is really embarrassing to watch - poor, sulky Taslima and poor, brave old man.
6. The mental mob then lay down its credentials: they represented "all of the 20 crore Muslims in India" according to an MP of the Majlis-e-Ittehadul Muslimeen (MIM), Asaduddin Owaisi, an abomination I saw for the first time yesterday. [Enjoy your moment in the limelight, you horrific blight to humanity.]
7. This self-same Owaisi was then seen on all news channels staunchly defending and praising the attackers, and once more *cringe*cringe*cringe* bringing in 'Islam' and 'Muslims' into all of the ugliness.

The Outrage and Opinion:
To Owaisi: You b@##$%#! Isn't it enough the whole world is having a ball at the expense of our religion already? Must you paint your perversions with the brush of Islam? No, you do not represent us, the 20 crore Muslims in India. No, it doesn't make a difference that Taslima Nasrin is not Indian, that she's in exile, that you feel she's a disgrace to Islam because she doesn't like following it, that she writes about things that are hard for you to stomach. She might have been a Puerto Rican nun for all we care - the fact remains that this was a lady whom you let loose on, unprovoked and in the most abominable manner. And then you justify your actions under the banner of Islam. Aaarrrggghhhhhh.

To the media: Have a care, journos. A little homework never harmed anyone, si? Here are some basic goof-ups and incorrect stereotyping that you've perfected to an art.
Lesson 1: Fatwa= opinion [NOT as is widely and popularly accepted, 'death sentence'].
Lesson 2: Islam = NOT a religion that preaches terror/violence. Root word 'Salaam' viz. 'peace' [as in Salaam alaikum]. Even if one did not give you the meaning of the Arabic root, one could hope that a basic respect be given to all world religions and it be quite understood that no faith preaches violence, killing, atrocity or wrong-doing. Why must you then repeatedly and wrongly use terms like Islamists/Islamic fundamentalists/Jihadis/mullahs/ Muslim extremists etc?
Lesson 3: Jehad/Jihad = To strive/struggle in the cause of God. It does not mean 'Holy War' or 'justified killing'. Don't use it alllll the time.
Lesson 4: Jehadis and terrorists are not interchangeable terms, thank you. If I strive to overcome some evil in myself, say trying to stop lying, I am a jehadi. Ergo, jehadi is not equal to terrorist. Simple, ja?
Lesson 5: Haraam= Absolutely, totally not allowed. Drinking alcohol is haraam. Suicide is haraam. Killing the blameless aged, women, children or any innocent person is haraam. Make of 9/11 and every other incident we hear of in Iraq nowadays what you will, those men can't claim to be Muslims. [My opinion, remember.]
Lesson 6: Muslims all over the world [I'm talking educated, civilized, real Muslims who have some knowledge of the Qur'an and Sunnah- not brainwashed illiterates, paid part-timers and chest-beating frenzied men who don't know better] hate what is happening to the name of Islam today. The media has never ever shown this overwhelming point of view. What with your minute-by-minute opinion polls, your wide-ranging documentaries, your impassioned lambasting of the horrors of terrorism, how come it never ever comes across that you BELIEVE that Muslims globally abhor the actions of terrorists, suicide bombers, spies, smugglers, underworld dons and the whole smorgasbord of evil that is now irrevocably connected with Islam? We don't like it either, get it? The few hundreds (or thousands) committing atrocities must never be assumed to be representative of the whole. How about you convey that repeatedly?

Another point:
Noted Muslim celebrities in India gave sound bytes yesterday (at least) expressing their disgust: Javed Akhtar [brilliant as always], Shabana Azmi [ho hum], Nafisa Ali. Ask me, a well-known scholar, a qualified mufti would be a more suitable mouthpiece for expressing Muslim outrage than fillum-ishtaars or Page 3 personalities , who, let's face it, aren't very strong in practice.
Unfortunately, we never see the established Islamic authorities/the educated ullema speak up against such outrages. This is a worm that has eaten across all the Muslim/Arab world. Be it Palestine, Afghanistan, Iraq, terrorism, the governments of all Muslim nations continue to sit mum and twiddle their thumbs, doing nothing. PATHETIC.

Some background to the whole brouhaha:
1. Ms. Nasrin is in India, exiled from her homeland Bangladesh on account of some old men feeling strongly that her book, Lajja, was insulting to Islam, Muslims, the Prophet (Peace be upon him) and thereafter issuing fatwas (Remember! 'Opinion'), death threats and pronouncements in the name of an aggrieved religion.
2. Lajja is none of the above. I have read, or rather, tried reading it. It was quite a pain to get through even the first few chapters and is one of the very few books I have left unfinished. Not because I was offended by the content but because I was bored to tears by it. According to me it was not a good book simply because in very long, excruciating portions it read more like a report on damages caused during the Bangla riots, and the mention of random names and unknown places for pages together failed to grip me. There was an attempted storyline in there somewhere but I lost the threads of that amid all the name-dropping.
3. I feel very strongly that the people who issued the fatwa haven't actually read the substandard book.
4. The book doesn't have anything anti-Islamic in it per se, it is just an account of the maltreatment of the minority Hindu population in Bangladesh during the riots that ensued post the destruction of the Babri Masjid in India [Whole new can of worms. I shan't even go there]. It so happened that the tormentors were the majority Bangla Muslim populace. What is so unbelievable about that?
5. As in all riot scenarios, the weak are always victimised, abused and in general, teated in such a way that 'majority' and 'minority' have no meaning anymore, the only thing that matters to anyone who can see is 'humanity'. Or rather, the lack of it.
6. Nasrin's book just put together many instances where people went rampaging, killing, raping in the name of their religion. Wronging others. Again in the name of their religion. These malefactors happened to be so-called Muslims. In the same way that when the Gujarat riots happened, the aggressors happened to be Hindus. And in the same way that the good old Serbian ethnic cleansers [I'm talking Bosnia] happened to be Orthodox Christians.
My point is that evil does not belong to any faith or religion. Tyrants, terrorists, reprobate persons cannot lay claim to any faith in the midst of their heinous actions.


Oh, look at me, I'm as bloody boring as Taslima's book. Enough. I am done.