Friday, December 31, 2004

i turned back and saw...

... the best times of my life a little way behind.. and a little disturbance at the very end.

we could say it all started at the end of 2001, with my cousin brothers wedding in dubai.. when old, ugly ties were severed.
a good job if i do say so myself..

come 2002 and the saab finds greatest funs and louve in her chuddybuddies in the bangalore.. the close of college saw many good times. loafing and laughing at random.

the boomsa on one end, out of college, but always tharr-mins-tharr only.
the reconciliation with bones and the lot.. [esp the warmest, longest hug i can remember].
the crazy hooliganism with roomies and other assorted comedians.

close of college and i take my sabbatical back home.. many sweet presents from friends, boomsa drops me to the station, friends come to see me off, and a bawling weepy session on the platform at bangalore central..

9 months of settling in at our new home in jammu.. moving furniture about, building wooden cabinets, painting, and the joy of having a baby room to help grow up..
..which growing up began immediately with scribblings on walls, doors and cupboard surfaces... [the anands of bangalore left their indelible mark on an innocent and very malleable sabbah].

come 2003, and little rumblings of impatience begin gnawing at the saab's vitals... the thought of a so-far-so-bloody-far vasantahabba annoys her insides like nobody's bloody business...
so she plans a return journey..
friends back in bangalore are like:: whaaa..? but we just sent u off! all those presents wasted?? *scoff*the protaganist remains unperturbed.

under the pretext of earning her keep, saab gets a lousy underdog's job with kpmg sthg or the other..
works muchly for not so muchly when she sees her paycheck.. but its lovely to be working at sthg grand, and standing on ur own 2 feet, she feels.
likes the job after a bit.

loves the little time she gets off to be with friendses. watches many ungodly hour movies with alaura, has untimely coffees with a boomsa, keeps yakking with the college bunch on phoneses and so Time runs on..

come the end of 2003, and the saba is informed of her betrothal in dubai..
frantic emails ensue, chats and yaks later, all is well..
the good news goes round..
saab maintains a low profile.. keeps up the act of single-and-was-never-ready-to-mingle-anyways-so-it-doesn't-make-a-difference..

2004 arrives at an audit in the orifices of an infosys.

vasantahabba happens with many gracious thwankses to boomsa and her friends.. many funs were had, and we fell in loves with an 'indian ocean'. not the current tragic one. anothers.

then july... mins like, my nikaah. mins like, thrilled to heavenly bits that a boomsa, with her side platter of smashed potatoes [shwilpaaz], and a laura, could be there to do that.

months run on.. a beautiful ramadan ensues, and passes by.
soon after, my cousin next door is wed..

a month left for my own 'bidaai'.. in dubai. [po-yum].

frantic runnings around to arrange passport copies for visa copies, last minute shwoppings, ticket arrangements and the whole circus, as it were.

mid-dec 2004..
pack-up for dubai. the entourage leaves. short stint in delhi, and tadaaa.....
welcome to dubai..
the new family gives us a warm-mushy-sweetest welcome at the airport. surprise surprise, a stretchiest ever limousine has been arranged for saba and husband!! white limo, black leather interior, lights, bar [whattawaste] and sthg many elses.. felt like we needed to shoot a music video in there.. also felt like we should have more people in there with us.. whatever happened to car pooling?

a few short details later, shro dahling arrives from bangalore.. how i beam on her.. how she beams back!! what a joyous times.
as per dna coding, she blends in immediately with the background and is at home in my home, even referring to my folks as 'mama' and 'abba'.. aww. shwucks. so mins kyoot only.

my fabida arrives also as vell... after many years, i see her. quid pro quo.. you came for my wedding-dong, im here for urs.

thwanks u both the manies for sweet gifts.

23rd dec- the grand mehndi raat... fritty-pretty understated gold tissue lehenga thingy from delhi.
25th dec- grandiose reception at emirates towers.. makeup by a wonderwoman from lahore.
3.5 hrs of hard work to effect a change in the exeriors of my landscape. wardrobe by some designer in lahore, pakistan. huge and heavy maroon & mustard sharara.. [boomsa frowns an indo-brahmin frown and froths at the mouth, hissing sweet nothings at these 'mussss-limz peoples'.]

26th dec- the 'waleema' function.. wardrobe courtesy designer from karachi?? dunno exactly. its an either or between the reception suit and this night. beige and light bluest fish-tail squirt. make-up thankfully from home.


dinners various ensue..
very mitthai colour jango jvellries, on all nigths. sad but true.

sadder and also true was that shro left soonest.. tried to run her thru the entwire to-do list of dubai, but in winter, the days are shwort. at least she had many shee-shahs. hope she's stoned enough for to last the new years.

in the interim, the worst news sweeps across the world. a tidal wave of incomprehensibility. new numbers to hit us in the face every morning. new videos, new horrors. i'lll leave it at that. shaking one's head and wondering isn't helping anyone.

and that was the time that was.. just a huge summary of things.. very well begun, but quite badly done in the end.

one can only hope we're looking at better times ahead. i believe we are. like they say in every second movie, things can only get better from here.

happy new year. seriously.
g'bye and godspeed.

Sunday, December 26, 2004

day 1 y'all

hello hello mins.
here i is from our hotel in dubai..reception over and done with last night.. sources at the crime scene say it was a stunner. i strongly recommend the Emirates Towers Hotel on the Sheikh Zayed Highway for anyone with shitloads of money and time to spare for a gorgeous holiday in the Gulf.

by the highway
in a highrise
living the highlife for a bit

or something.
26th floor.. lovely view, great facilities, service, and and and.... how long before i said it?? FOODSSSS!

Come and enjoy. khawu and i have just finished a sinful breakfast.. 300 calories per meal is my target.

shall be done.
till then, that is, till u get pictures of my new expand-look, ta!

Monday, December 13, 2004

4 days

and this is not a rip off of '7 days' by a certain Amreekan songster, whose name at the moment eludes me...
oh wait!! its that craig david, and i dont like his crooning one bit...

4 days is in fact just-and-only a pure algebraic statement, a mathematical fact, when seen as the number of days i have left here in jammu, with kith and kin..

ugh. whatta situations.. have to get back to doing somthing soonest.. cant poosibly be ranting on and on about how many days are left of my old life..

am done.

Thursday, December 09, 2004

the run down

ladies and others..

we leave the us of j&k on the 17t of this month.. thats about a week away, plus one or 2, which dont count in the larger scheme of things..

my bags are still unpacked..

bent my back yesterday ironing out my new clothes, and then tossing them hither and thither for the assorted siblings and maters to pack in fancy-shmancy ways, in cellophane packs... [my conscience cringes at what im doing to the environment in my small-scale life!]

theres a rumor going around [my mom started it] that my kith and kin.. are...from now on, every night going to turn up at chez haji and sing and dance and cry for the bride to be.. eeeyuk. *my toes curl upwards in a fsahion reminiscent of the olden days when i was thrown in close proximity with an aunt of the boomsa's*].

how i hate the show and the sha...esp the sha bit... leave me be.. i mean, i love my foks, but lets not be corny! admittedly though, i have been an active part of similar show-shas for other relatives' wedding things.. serves me right!@

the upside: isnt there always one??... im getting invited for dinners and yum things of similiar natures, at everybody's house.. aah, the joy of rich, meaty, spiced up kashmiri cuisine!!
hehehehhe//.. so sorry noopa and other veggies..its the true.

as an aside, storm's turning out to be more adorable everyday. everyday in every way, he gets better and better.
[the above is called a non sequitir.]

on that off-tune note, i end.

Sunday, December 05, 2004

the lord of many rings

so anyways, how did i forget to mention that a hair-raising and exciting beyond words incident of the recent past?
the date was the 24th of nov, 2004. circa 1900hrs, IST.

saba was in the middle of cousins wedding... cousin had called home a beautician.. very ugly looking, and when i say ugly i mean evil, sinister and a no-good-types.

as i ran my vibescan over her anatomy, i got a strong: BEWARE! flashcard in neon and udder like colours.

the lady [naw, not lady, grotesquette actually] took her time about doing my cousin up, with hot wax and various chemical things happening to her. then was my time, with much more hot wax.. and then i asked her to leave casually, which she did in grand spirits..

a new hairless saba starts getting ready for the gaana-bajaana at cousins place.
saba wears saucy new wedding party outfit, saba combs-brushes hair, swoons in some perfume and as a finishing touch, heads for her rings... ooh, lookee at that, isnt this strange, my ring holder is upturned, various rings strewn across my drawer..
search search, all gold and silver rings intact.. search gets more frantic, panic levels start upping, dismay and horror make an appearance.. the saab realises her diamond ring, her engagement-nikaah ring is missing. is stolen.. nooooooooooo!!!! who gave a damn about the other small fry.... my ring!
next thought: bloody b#$$@@#!! it was her i tell u. it was the grotesquette....

ceratainty causes dismay and other useless emotions to run into wrath... hell hath no fury like a woman wronged, and by another woman to boot...

quick calls made to 3 of our SP relatives... immediate swinging into action.. the pater, the uncle, the cousin bro and a mother reach the accused's house [how we found that out dont ask] with police peoples.. police heads in alone. basic interrogations.. the witch bitch ugly-beautician confidently refuses.. the police dude searches her house. then grabs her handbag... feels along the inner lining after emptying out an innocent beauticians handbag.. finds an ingenious lump.
sewed into the inner lining and hidden among cotton balls, is my... RING!!!!!!
witch bitch gets cocky, starts a rude barrage.. police uncle man slaps her hard and fast. my mater faints... and amidst all the hulla ballooo, our whole family waits on tenterhooks at home for latest updates from the crime scene.

a moblie phone in each hand at either end helps. a celebratory call made.. joy and shouting at both ends.. forget the wedding, a new joy is at hand!!
the accused and guilty grotesquette, taken along with police peoples to jails. on the way to the car, she threatens my ma. says: yeh tumne acha nahin kiya, mein dekh loongi!!!! gawd.
police escort her to her new temp abode..the clinker. probably beaten up all night. by morning, she has revealed a lot more than she was letting out the previous night.
so much for bravado.

and thats my story..
a short epilogue..
the police, very proud of themselves, as they should be, print the whole escapade in many dailies the next morning.. pa and i are famous, celebrities of a small town.
[go to state, scroll down a bit and see the beauty!]

downside: the indian legal system shows its true and ugly side.. turns out, now we have to run to the courts every so often to prove that the ring is mine!

and that's a wrap.
hope u enjvaiied the show.

who killed the mockingbird?

apparently no one,
but i had to use some title..

it so happens that im currently involved deeply and thoroughly in packing for my impending future as a married something. mins to say like, i have to filter, sort, choose and discard. from my old stuff.. to be able to fit into my new suitcases to take aways with me to my new digs..
4 cases, and a lifetime to pack. ouch.

have left behind most of everything.. have taken special somethings that i know i cant stand losing..
tinkerbells from boomsa..[maybe she got them from pondi?], and her swell present of rumi to me...
poetries bookses from shro...
old musics, hidden beneath new clothes-stuff, bcoz if mama sees thems, she'll faint. [all she's thinking in terms of nowadays is 'baggage allowed per person'].
special bookses... 'to kill a certain mockingbird' among them!
all corny foto-albums from school up...
old jeans-pents, assorted pyjamas, tattered kurtas and tshirts from a different age..
many many many bags that grownups in my family fail to understand. hyuk.

and so on and so forth..
painfull as hell... and since i can't swear anymore, except in my head, i just have this much to say:


Saturday, November 20, 2004

an observation

a wedding has begun..

not in an oh-no-not-another-one! state of mind..
[though our cup HATH runneth over this year with a triple whammy of weddings thus far, and a redo of nuptials for me this december..].

the nousheen, being a first cousin, is being sent aways to her new homes.. to a boy from srinagar.. to a boy she is smitten with, and who smitts her back in return.. a sweet li'l innocent louwe story that dates back,oh... 6 years now!
he being a distant relative on her paternal side.. they must have grown up together with all cousins and at the regular home-stead..

we kashmiris have a strange way with family.. in that we're always stuck together.. adhesive as hell. the whole jing-bang and accessories.. that means at least 4 khaalas [maasis], 2 maamus, 3 chachas, an assortment of puphis and various other glitterati.. along with their kids. its funs like no other. chuddybuddies fromm childhood up.. also, it turns out that we're all very family-centric at the end of the day.. i mean, when u have the populace of a small township as kith and kin, you dont really need to socialise with outsiders that much. so the kids are left alone to grow up wild and tough in each others company.. the elder cousins look after the little ones..
and.. heres where things get interesting...

older cousins, teens and grown-ups, with no other social outlet become darn chummy with each other, see? what good friends we be, how-well-we-understand-each-other, corny jokes and card games... from there on it sometimes moves on to furtive glances, private grins, corner of the eye observations.. and the clincher!!! MOOD SWINGS!! unexplained at that. in a word,very very oft, we have sweet little romances blossoming on various distant branches of the same family tree!! wah, what a metaphor.

not to say that this is what always happens, but its pretty special. extremely cute. if i were an athropologist, methinks id be straining at my leash trying to get right into the heart of a kashmiri clandom.
what knowledge, what gems, what pearls of wisdom...!!

aw shaddup already, saba.
im taking a bow

ps:[when i didnt know any better a few many years ago, i used to think Godspeed was a super special turbo mode for car racing.. sigh. one better than SuperScorcher-speed even!]

oh well.

Tuesday, November 16, 2004

up and at 'em, face!

the calm before the storm has passed..
stormy is raging away... as always, in that quirky fashion of his where he deems it below himself to bark at strange looking strangers,but instead, takes immense pleasure in scaring the smithereens out of poor little cats and mice and such like creatures, unfamiliar to his kind.
shameless,i say..

but but but, so long as hottie is chomping away again, and his coat is doing its shny show again,all is well in this world.


Saturday, November 13, 2004

my mutt and me

a sad day
a dreary day

poor storm is feeling .. errr... a bit under the weather..
mins to say,
droopy lids,
tired little mug
tragic magic sad looks
and nary a word of complaint..
aww shucks.

ray of hope.. he sipped on milk yesterday, after 2 days of fasting. methinks he's taking this religious fervour thingy with ramadan a bit far.

take care of u, hotcrossbuns.
i will anyway.


mins like, a venting of emotions..
im trying to wash out my potty-mouth and never use swear words again.. tee heee.. i mean, except for when im really riled..
[and also as vell 'damn', 'dammit', 'hotdammit', 'pissed', 'stuppidd', 'idiot', 'shutttupyourmouthok' and such like dont count as cusswords. i can use them].
also, this does not mean that i dont appreciate the appropriate use of cuss words and other such satisfying outlets for venom when done in a classy and tasteful manner.. cf: Vernon God Little.. whattabook!
lovely lovely and aslo lovely. i mean, of course not in a make-you-feel-good, warm and fuzzy inside sort of way, but in a way that we sorts like it..
boomsa, will try and post it to you. dont buy it yet, i have a nice new copy for thee.

uh oh, i must aways..

Saturday, October 30, 2004

and boomsa said...

that i was a saab, and shite!!! how did u know that, luv..
lemme share childhood dreams with furrsons.. we had a gorgeous, and i mean this in the extremest sense of the word... GORGEOUS Saab, back when i was still in 3rd or 4th grade.. a dull slate grey color, and it smelt and felt ... awesome..
and ever since then, i thot, this must be my car when im all big.
and then the anoo says im a saab and all seems fated right.
thwanx only.

Tuesday, October 26, 2004

stuffy and nonsense

what a god-awful feeling... i hab a code.. ids vedy disturbing.. mins to say, my head feels like a stuffed something or the other...
an impending implosion makes itself felt.. ye olde internal organs, beware.. as if people didnt think i was snotty enough earlier, i now have actual physical evidence of the same. eeeyuk.

the abovementioned horrific state of affairs has ensued on account of a rash and blink-and-u-miss-it trip to delhi, for nuptial shoppingses. that was the idea.. 3 days in a pleasant delhi for complete trousseau requirements.. all is hunky dory till day 3 when the saba feels squeamish and uneasy in the inner throat region of her anatomy. very crazy shooping for 12 hours plus a dash to various staions and whatnots, cannot and did not help matters...
upshot.. arrival in jmu with an unbalanced state of mind and very heavy suitcases. read as: sick to my stomach..

and that is how things stand today.. to make things better, [it never rains but pours!!], the weather's acting all adoloscency like..
mins to say, cant make up its mind whether it wants to stay a comfy fall,or turn into nail-biting-c-c-c-c-old winter already.. so we have a 2-faced clime to accompany my chills and, err... yes, it must be said, spills.. blanket-wrapping and sockses-tugging has begun in full earnest. life's a lark.
oh hedd..
thats id then. swimmy vision, and jaw-locking headache in tow,
i bid u


Friday, October 15, 2004

of tomorrows and after

a month begins tomorrow.. no, im not speaking in tongues.
it would be in the lunar world that people would instantly jump up and say, " Oi! i know what she's getting at, the scarfy rascal..".
to release the immense pressure of 'not-knowing' that weighs on all ur shoulderses, the answer is.. Ramadan! yeahhh..

fasting feasting in the truest sense.. any delusions that the world has that we starve ourselves and reallly! how-do-they-do-it- yakitty-yak, doesnt apply.. we go the whole hog.
cliches seem to be appearing. i must disappear.

Tuesday, October 12, 2004

it happened one afternoon

and it was a saba..!!
just and only the first time i have blogged. but more to come, or as the lovely stipes says,